Are you happy now ?
by no1slayer
Summary: buffy and her new husband move from Rome to LA where buffy meets up with old friends and old flames. the title of the fanfic i got from a song by Michelle Branch are you happy now. if you listen to that song, it kinda reflects the fanfic aswell. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter one – A new life

Rome Italy 

The sun was beaming through the open window. The white drapes where blowing softy in the midday breeze. There was the distant sound of cars in the distance. But Buffy was sitting on her bed looking at a picture on her nightstand. It was a beautiful photograph of her on her wedding day. She was wearing a long white dress and the man standing next to her was tall dark and handsome. His name was Carlo. They had met in a small café where she had been a waitress. They just started talking and things led on from there.

Buffy heard the front door open and she came out of her day dream and stood up and walked out of the bedroom. She walked through the living room of their little apartment and went to the hall. She saw Carlo closing the door behind him.

"Hey" she said and walked over to him. She stood on her tip toes and kissed him.  
"Hi" he said in his Italian accent. He gave her a smile and pulled her into a hug.  
" how was work?" Buffy asked her husband as she pulled out of the hug.  
"It was ok" Carlo said. He walked into the living room and sat down on the sofa. He took off his shoes and put them on the little rack they had. He liked everything to be tidy and he did more tidying than Buffy did.

Buffy followed carol into the living room and sat down next to him. She sweeped a piece of his hair out of his eyes and smiled. He smiled back at her and put his arm around her.

"I've been thinking about what you said" Carlo said to Buffy looking at her  
" yeah?" Buffy asked him hopefully. She had wanted to move back to America, preferably LA. She missed the familiarity. She wasn't sure whether carol would want to move but she had been dropping hints for a while and asked him a couple of time. She knew he had commitments at work, but he could find a job in LA.

"I think we could give it a go" Carlo said with a smile.  
Buffy eyes brightened. "Really? I mean, you don't mind?" she asked  
"of course not. Anything for my girl" Carlo said with a smile.

Buffy pulled him into a passionate kiss and hugged him.


	2. Chapter 2

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter two – Another day of bliss

2 weeks later

They had managed to sell their little apartment quite quickly. It was in such good condition and there were a lot of buyers looking for an apartment like theirs. They had already bought a house in LA. Buffy had been looking before she even asked Carlo. They had bought a 3 bedroom house near the city centre so they could find work easily.

The sound of cars screeching filled the air. With the additional noise of everyone talking it made Buffy think about how quiet her little apartment in Rome was.

Buffy and Carlo walked out of the airport holding hands. A lot of their belongings where being shipped over from Italy. All they had was a big suitcase each and Buffy hoped to buy new things in LA. Carlo had a good job and had quite a bit of money, which Buffy didn't mind at all. Even though, before they were married, she didn't realise he had so much money. He didn't really show it off, which was one thing that Buffy like about him. They hailed a cab to take them to their new home. The cab ride had been quiet. Buffy had been looking out of one window and Carlo the other. He seemed fascinated by all the lights, like Rome wasn't a big enough city already.

The estate agent had left the keys underneath a flower pot like they had arranged. They hadn't actually been round the house physically. But they had been on a virtual tour using the internet. Buffy hoped it was everything she expected it to be.

Buffy practically ran inside the house as soon as the door opened. She left her suit case at the door and Carlo closed the door behind them. The house was dark so he turned on the lights to illuminate the entrance hall. It was beautifully decorated like the pictures they saw.

"Oh my god" Buffy said with a big smile. "This is amazing!"

"Yes I know" Carlo said with a smile and went over to Buffy and put his arm around her.

The house already had some furniture in it. They walked around the house and looked at each room in detail. Everything was perfect just how they had imagined it.

After about an hour of looking around the house. Carlo decided to go have a look round the neighbourhood and Buffy decided to call willow to check in and see what was going on.

"Oh my god Will, it's amazing!" Buffy said as she walked around her new bedroom. She was thinking about how to decorate it.

"I should come over and see it some time" willow said  
"yeah you should, cause I miss you guys a lot" Buffy said.

"I know we miss you too!" willow said

Their conversation continued for about an hour when Buffy decided she was tired and should get some sleep. Willow said she would do the same and Buffy hung up the phone.

Buffy went to her new bathroom and had a quick shower and got changed into some pj's. She got into their temporary bed, which was a mattress on the floor and a little box as a nightstand. She wondered where her husband was. He'd been gone along time. 'God I hope he's not in trouble' she thought to herself.

Buffy had been asleep for another hour before Carlo got back. He got ready for bed and watched her sleep for while then fell asleep himself.

Buffy awoke to the smell of bacon. She licked her lips a little and opened her eyes. The bright daylight was shining through a crack in the curtains. She yawned and sat up in bed and noticed that Carlo wasn't there. She got up out of bed and pulled on a dressing gown out of her suitcase. She walked out of the bedroom and made her way downstairs.

She walked into the kitchen to see Carlo standing by the cooker. She smiled and rubbed her eyes.  
"Hi" she said sleepily.

"Oh your awake, I was going to bring this up to you" Carlo said with a smile.

Buffy smiled at him. He was the perfect husband. " aww your sweet." She said and went over to him. She laced her arms around his waist and hugged him. He smiled and turned his head to hiss her on the forehead then went back to cooking.

Buffy walked over to the refrigerator and looked inside. "Hey you got food" Buffy said surprised.  
"Yeah "Carlo said, "that's why I was out so late last night. I went to get some food. I know you, if you don't eat you get moody" he smiled.

"Hey I do not get moody" Buffy said with a smile. "Well, maybe a little". She pulled out a carton of orange juice and poured herself a glass. "You want some?" she asked

"I'm ok thanks pet, I've just had a glass" Carlo said with a smile.

'Pet'. That word rang in Buffy's head. SPIKE . She went off into a daydream. She had forgotten about him. How he died to save the world. She loved him, well she had loved him. But she was married now, she couldn't love him anymore. He was gone and there was nothing she could do about it.

"Here you go" Carlo said to Buffy holding out a plate with a bacon sandwich on it. "Hello …. Buffy"

"Huh oh yeah" Buffy said shaking her head a little.

"You ok?" he asked her concerned.

"Yeah I'm fine" Buffy said with a smile and took the plate off her husband. She put it on the counter and took a bite. "Yum" she said with a smile.

Carlo smiled at his wife and started to eat his own.

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	3. Chapter 3

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter three – Everything is perfect

A week later, the house had a lot more furniture in it by now. They had been shopping everyday during the week and maybe bought too much. But the house looked so nice. It was starting to look like one of those houses in the catalogues.

After breakfast, Buffy decided she would go out into town and have a look around. She got changed into a pair of tight blue jeans and put her long blonde hair into a ponytail. She applied her make-up.

"You sure you won't come with me?" Buffy asked Carlo as she brushed her teeth.

"No, you go" Carlo said with a smile. "You go and have a good time. Buy yourself some new clothes as well if you want". He held out about ten fifty dollar bills.

Buffy looked down at the money in his hand. "Ok, now that is way too much" she told him.

"No, its fine honestly." Carlo said to her with a smile. "You deserve it!"

Buffy smiled and jumped into his arms and kissed him. She pulled away "thank you" she said as she put her forehead against his.

"Now go before I make you stay here" Carlo said with a grin. Buffy let go of him and walked to the front door. Carlo through her the car keys. "Take my car" he said. Carlo had a big shiny ice blue convertible. They only bought it a few days ago. The good thing about being wed to a rich guy was that she could show it off.

Buffy smiled widely. "Thanks" she said with a grin and ran out the door and down the drive way. She slid into the car and pulled the top back. The sun was beaming down on her and she put on her sunglasses. Buffy looked down at the stereo and flicked around with a couple of buttons. She managed to get the radio to work and turned it up.

She waved bye to Carlo who was standing at the top of the drive. It was nice to see her man in direct sunlight. She smiled and pulled out of the drive way. She drove down the street and pulled into a busy road. She was so happy. Nothing could spoil anything now.

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	4. Chapter 4

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter four – Missing 

Wolfram and Hart

Angel was sitting at his desk doing paper work. He'd lost contact with his contact in Rome. The one who had been checking up on Buffy to make sure she was ok. 'I hope she's ok' he thought to himself.

"Here is your blood bossy" harmony said with a smile as she placed the mug on Angel's desk.

Angel looked at harmony angrily.

"Ok sorry 'BOSS'" she said and rolled her eyes. "Anything else?" she asked

"No" angel said and looked back down at his paper work.

Harmony turned around and walked out of the office. As soon as shed left the room spike walked through the door.

"Hey! How come you get 'meals on wheels' and I don't!" he said walking over to angels desk.

"Because SPIKE you don't work here and another thing your just here to piss me off" angel said.

"Well true, but I think I'm doing a great job!" spike said with a smirk and sat down on one of the leather arm chairs in the office. "sooooo" spike started.

"SPIKE!" angel shouted. "Go away! Go piss off someone else". Spike had been annoying angel ever since he came out of that amulet. Ever since he got re-corporialised, spike had been trying to find ways to piss him off and he enjoyed it. It was Spikes favourite thing to do at the present time.

"Hey what's up with you? Let me guess you realised your a great big poof" spike smirked again

Angel looked up at Spike, "its Buffy" he said.

The smirk vanished from spikes face and he stood up. "What? Is she ok? What happened?"

"That's exactly it, I don't know. The contact I had in Rome …. I don't know where he is" angel said.

Spike was silent and looked down at his feet. He was trying to process this. Where was Buffy? What had happened to her? Spike looked over at angel again. "What? How long have you known this?" he asked angel.

Angel thought for a moment. " a couple of weeks I think" he said , he put his pen down on top of the paper work he was doing and put it in a draw. He closed it shut and locked it with a key.

"You known this for a couple of weeks and thought not to tell me!" spike shouted.

"It's nothing to do with you!" angel said to spike, he stood up from his chair and pushed his chair underneath his desk.

"WH…WHAT did you say!" spike asked nearly shouting. "Nothing to do with me? I love she, she loves me!"

Angel rolled his eyes. "I am gonna go find out whats happened to her". Angel walked out of his office and went over to harmony. Spike followed him and grabbed angel by the shoulder. He turned him around to face him.

"I'm going to help" spike said, "I don't care what you say. I need to help"

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	5. Chapter 5

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter five – old friends

Buffy pulled back into the drive, switched off the radio and got out of the car. She went around to the trunk and opened it. She grabbed about 10 different plastic bags which had all different designer names stamped on the side and which also carried her newly bought items. She smiled and slammed the trunk shut. Buffy clicked a button on the car keys which set the alarm on the car and she walked up to the house. She put the bags down on the step as she opened the front door.

"I'm back!" she shouted as she put the bags down on the floor.

There was no reply.

Buffy shrugged and walked into the living room, she walked over to the coffee table and looked down at a piece of paper lying on it.

'Found a job. Gone for a interview. Hope you had fun today. See you later. Love you, C xxx'.

She read it and smiled. She took off her jacket ad put it over the back of the sofa. Buffy rolled her shoulders and put her hands on her neck. 'I could use a bath' she thought to herself. She went and got herself a glass of apple juice and went upstairs to have a bath.

………………………

Wolfram and Hart

Angel had everyone working on finding Buffy for about six hours. He was in his office on his laptop; he read the last emails he was sent from his contact in Rome. They were nothing special really, just saying she was fine and happy

Wesley walked into angel's office carrying a piece of paper. "Angel" he said calmly

Angel looked up from the laptop screen. "Found anything?" he asked.

Spike looked up from his chair. He hadn't been helping much. Just sitting in his chair thinking about how Buffy loved him more than captain forehead. He hoped she was ok. "Yeah Nancy boy, found anything?"

Wesley ignored Spikes comment and looked at angel. "I think I've found her" he said.

Angel stood up, "Ok, good where is she?" he asked, he gave a quick glance at Spike.

"LA" Wesley said. He handed angel a piece of paper which had the exact address. It had taken him a while but he managed to track her down from plane tickets and estate agents.

"Ok" angel said, "I better go check that she's ok" he started to walk towards the door.

"Angel, I'm not sure if that's a good idea" Wesley said. He didn't want to get his head bitten off but he didn't think it was a good idea to go barging over to Buffy without even a phone call.

"What do you mean, I'm coming as well" Spike said. "You can forget it mate. Your not going in there and sweeping her off her feet. That's my job!"

Angel looked at Wesley and ignored Spike. "I don't care. I need to check on her"

Wesley nodded and walked out of the office and angel followed as well. Spike caught up to angel as he walked into the elevator to go down to the underground parking lot.

As the elevator moved angel and spike threw threatening glances at each other. Angel gritted his teeth; spike had no problem speaking his mind.

"What's the point in you going? She doesn't love you anymore remember" spike said to him.

"Oh that's why she's moved on from you is it?" angel said.

"She hasn't moved on. She doesn't know I'm alive you idiot" spike said.

The doors opened and both men walked into the parking lot. Angel walked over to the viper and got in. spike got in the passenger seat.

"I knew you would choose the viper, you predictable git" spike said.

Angel didn't reply to the bleach blonde next to him. He started the car and drove out of the parking lot.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Buffy's house 

The sun had set and darkness covered LA. Buffy got out of the bath and rapped a towel around her, she hadn't realised shed fallen asleep whilst reading her book in the bath. She placed her book on the radiator to dry. She walked into the bedroom and started to get dry. She got dressed and put on a long black skirt and white strappy top. She was just about to blow dry her hair when there was a knock on the door.

"Oh god" Buffy said with a sigh. She wrapped her hair in the towel and walked downstairs. "I'm coming" she shouted as she checked how she looked in the mirror. She would do.

She opened the door and a cool breeze drifted into the house. She looked at the two figures in front of her. It was Angel and Spike.

Buffy eyes froze on spike. She couldn't speak, her mouth felt completely dry. She made a few vowel sounds then didn't say anything after that.

Spike looked at Buffy. She was more wonderful than ever. She was as beautiful as he remembered her, maybe even more beautiful. "Buffy" he began.

"no no no no no" Buffy said she turned around so not facing them. She pinched herself and turned around again. They were still standing there.

Angel looked at Buffy. He could see she was in shock. "Buffy" angel said quietly.

Buffy turned her head to look at angel. "Can we come in or shall we stand here all night?" he asked.

" Emmm yeah sorry come in" Buffy said as she stepped away from the door. She watched Angel walk in followed by Spike. She still couldn't believe it. Spike, her spike, was alive. Well as alive as a vampire with a soul can be. She closed the door behind them and walked into the living room.

Angel sat down on the sofa. At least he knew she was safe. He looked at spike who was just staring at Buffy. He tilted his head to the side and smiled a little.

"You look good" spike said to her.

Buffy looked at him and smiled a little. "You're …. You're … here." She said. "In my house…" she couldn't really think straight. Spike always spun her head a little. But she thought he was gone. Now he was standing in her living room, clear as day.

Spike looked at her. He stepped a little closer. "Yeah I know" he said calmly. He knew Buffy would react like this. He hadn't told her he was alive because he had gone out in a blaze of glory, saving the world. And when he was brought back, first thing through his mind was Buffy. It always was and always would be Buffy. He couldn't tell her that he was alive, it would of cancelled out all his 'saving the world'. But now he wanted her to know. Maybe they still had chance.

"Spike I…." Buffy started to say as the front door opened.

"I'm home" called Carlo. He walked into the living room and saw the two men. "Who the hell are you?" he asked

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………….


	6. Chapter 6

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter six – we need to talk

Spike looked at Buffy then at the guy who had just entered the room. "Who are you?" spike asked him as his eyes looked him up and down. He looked quite smart; maybe he was a lawyer at Wolfram and Hart.

Carlo looked uneasily at Buffy then looked at Spike. "I'm Carlo" he said simply.

Spike looked back at Buffy. He felt his heart sink to the floor. Did she have a new boyfriend? It hadn't been that long since he went away, well a couple of years, but that's not a lot, spike thought to himself.

Buffy looked down at the ground. She swallowed hard. How was she going to tell angel and spike she was married? She looked back up at spike and angel.

"Carlo is my husband" Buffy said quietly. With his vampire hearing, spike could hear it perfectly.

"Your what?" spike asked. Even though he heard her fine. He couldn't believe his ears.

"She is married to me" Carlo said in his distinct Italian accent. "Now who exactly are you to?".

Spike felt like punching Carlo so hard that it would send him flying out of the big windows in the living room causing them to smash and show his anger. But he knew he couldn't. Buffy would just get angry at him and he never wanted that. Spike was already scheming a way to get her back.

"They are old friends" Buffy said quickly before spike could say anything he would regret. "I knew them when I lived in Sunnydale". She took a deep breathe before she continued. She couldn't look at spike. She could feel how hurt he was from across the room. "They were in the neighbourhood and decided to drop by"

Carlo didn't really believe Buffy but didn't argue with her. He would talk to her later. He nodded and walked off into the kitchen to pour him self a scotch. He felt he was going to need it.

When Buffy was sure Carlo was gone. She looked back at angel and spike. "What are you two doing here anyway?" she asked.

"Well that's a nice 'welcome back from the dead aint it" Spike said to Buffy. He was expecting her to either kiss him or kill him. At the moment she was doing neither.

Buffy looked at him. She had missed him so much and now she had Carlo, he was nice but he wasn't Spike.

"I'm sorry" Buffy said to spike softly. "But you can't just come here and expect me to drop everything just because your some how alive". As soon as Buffy said this she regretted it instantly. It sounded like she was happy to see him. Even though she didn't show it inside she was doing cart wheels and back flips because she was so happy. But then she thought of Carlos. When she met him she forgot about spike and how much she loved him. Her love had transferred to Carlos easily.

Spike felt hurt at what Buffy had just said. "We better be going then" spike said.

Angel looked at spike then Buffy. He kept his feelings about Buffy's marriage to himself. He loved Buffy, he always had. Angel was waiting for her to become 'cookie dough'. He remembered their conversation they had in a Sunnydale graveyard when he had given her the amulet.

"No spike I didn't mean it like that. I'm just confused maybe you could come back tomorrow?" Buffy asked spike.

Spike gave her a quick nod then glanced back at angel. "Come on then peaches" he said. He walked over to Buffy. He looked into her eyes and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. He didn't want her to get in trouble with her husband.

Angel did the same and walked to the front door. Carlos was leaning against the doorframe to the kitchen. He watched the two men leave.

Buffy closed the door after them and sighed. She leaned back against the door then noticed carlos watching her.

"We need to talk" Carlo said to her simply.

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	7. Chapter 7

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter seven – The explanation

Buffy was sitting on the sofa in the living room and Carlo was sitting in one of the arm chairs. Buffy had just explained to Carlo about her being the slayer and everything that had happened in Sunnydale, well the stuff he didn't know already. Everything about Angel, Riley, Spike and all of her friends. Carlo had been sitting in shock for the last couple of hours whilst Buffy spoke.

"So" Carlo said. "You're a slayer and you stake vampires. Angel and Spike are your ex boyfriends who are actually vampires but they have souls" he said unsurely.

"Yeah that's right" Buffy said. "I know this has come as a bit of a shock and I'm sorry I couldn't tell you before"

"a bit of a shock is an understatement" Carlo said as she leaned back in his chair. He sat for a couple of moments in silence as he tried to get all this new information through his head.

Buffy looked down at the ground. He sounded angry with her, but how could she change her past. She couldn't, that would be impossible. He would have to deal with it.

"So that bleach blonde man that was here early was your ex boyfriend who died saving the world" he said trying to see if he understood.

Buffy looked up. "Yeah" she said simply.

"Ok" Carlo said. "Does he want you back? You did tell him you are married and everything?"

"Of course I did" Buffy said. "I am surprised I did, I was in shock, I still am" she looked at Carlo. "But he knows and he will deal with it. He's gonna be ok" she explained.

"I don't care about him. I care about you. I don't want him to come and steal you away from me. I love you more than him you know that know that right" Carlo said.

Buffy smiled at her husband and stood up and she went over to him and sat on his lap. "Of course and I love you too". Buffy pulled her husband into a deep hug. She smiled and let go of him.

"Do you still love him?" Carlo asked her.

"Angel? No we've been over for ages" Buffy said with a smile,

Carlo frowned. "You know who I mean. Do you still love Spike?"

Buffy was quiet she didn't know what to say. She loved Carlo but some where inside her she knew she loved spike. Now he was back everything was just confusing. Buffy stood up again.

Carlo watched his wife. He couldn't believe this; his wife was in love with another man. "You love him" he said. His voice sounded so full of hurt.

Buffy turned to look at him. "I didn't say that" she replied. "I'm confused. Before spike …. Before he left I loved him. But he's been gone for a while. I'm just confused. My head is spinning and I don't know what to think."

Carlo thought for a moment. "How can you love someone that has hurt you so many times? You said he tried to ……. rape you" he found it hard to say the words.

"That was……" Buffy looked down. "That was along time ago and he's different now. But I'm not getting back together with him. I'm married and I love you!"

"Ok" Carlo said. "But I don't want you to see him anymore"

Buffy was shocked. "What? He's a friend, you can't stop me from talking to my friends no one has that right not even you" she said. She couldn't believe he had just told her what to do. No man could ever order her around.

"Buffy" Carlo said. "From what you told me, this spike is deeply in love with you. And I know what that's like and I don't think he will stop at nothing to get you back. So you must stay away from him!".

Some how, Buffy knew this was true. Spike did love her and she didn't think he would give up easily. All she did was nodded. Even though she knew she would have to go see angel and spike to sort everything out between them. She looked down at her watch. "Its late and I'm tired. I'm gonna head up" she walked out of the living room and went upstairs to bed.

Carlo didn't say anything. He stayed down in the living room thinking for most of the night whilst Buffy slept and dreamt about all of the possibilities that could change her life around into another direction.

………………………

The following morning Buffy told Carlo she was going out to buy some food for the week but instead she drove to wolfram and hart. She needed to speak to Spike and explain herself. She felt that Angel understood and he might try to help her with spike. She didn't want to screw things up with Carlo. She loved him too much to hurt him.

She took his car and drove towards wolfram and hart. Her stomach was doing summer-saults. She looked around all the high rise building of LA. She had to find herself a job soon, but first she needed to sort things out. Buffy had woken up many times during the night after having terrible dreams about Carlo breaking up with her. She also noticed that Carlo wasn't in bed next to her. She was worried about him but decided to leave him alone.

Buffy pulled into the underground parking lot of wolfram and hart. She got out o the car and locked it. She looked around she couldn't see any stair way so she walked out the way she came in and walked up to the front of the building. She looked up to the sky and it looked like it touched the clouds. It was a massive place. She wasn't sure whether this was a good idea. Carlo wouldn't be happy about it, but she needed to do this for herself. It would set her mind at rest.

Buffy walked into the big building and took in a deep breathe when she looked around. It was huge, well she could see that from the outside but this was just amazing. She took a few steps forward then a demon brushed past her. She jumped a little, but to her surprise it didn't attack her. She walked towards the receptionist desk. She didn't really pay any attention to the person sitting there.

"Hi I need to see angel" Buffy said as she turned her head to look around the lobby.

"Oh my god" the receptionist said. "Buffy?" she questioned.

Buffy turned her head to look at the woman sitting behind the desk. "Harmony?" she said in shock. "What are you doing here?"

"I work here" harmony said. She put her magazine that she was reading down on the desk. "How have you been?"

Buffy smiled awkwardly. "I'm ok, you?" she asked. Buffy was just being polite.

"I'm great. I work here, the salaries not great but I get by. And oh my god there is so much to talk about being round here. I get all the goss. Ok now Jessica down in Non-Human resources said…".

Buffy cut harmony off. "Harmony" she said, "is angel around I really need to speak to him".

Harmony looked at her. "Hey! I was making polite conversation, no need to be rude."

Buffy sighed. "Ok I'm sorry I didn't mean to its just I need to speak to Angel it's important."

"Oh ok" Harmony said. "He's in his office." Harmony pointed over to a set of double doors. "You can go straight through".

Buffy turned on her heels and walked over to these doors. She took in a deep breathe and walked in.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………..


	8. Chapter 8

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling errors, I blame my stupid spell check. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter eight

Angel was sitting at his desk when the doors opened. He looked up from his work and saw Buffy close the doors behind her.

"Hey" Buffy said with a weak smile. She didn't know how angel would react.

"Hi" angel said to her, he was surprised that she was here. He wasn't expecting her.

"You're not busy are you?" Buffy asked him as walked further into the large office. She looked around the office. "Wow" she said, "it's a lot bigger than your other place"

"Yeah" angel said, still unsure of why she was here.

Buffy looked at him. Ok maybe she should get right to the point. "Emmm" she started, she didn't know how to start. "I wanted to apologise for how … ya know ... when I told you about Carlo …. It came out wrong" she said

Angel looked at her, "its ok" he said.

"No, no it's not" Buffy said, "I shouldn't have told you to like that."

Angel thought for a moment. "Buffy, its ok. I know why you did. You were shocked, I get it, really I do" he said.

Buffy smiled weakly and nodded a little. She wandered over to the windows then looked over her shoulder at him. "How come your not dust?" she asked.

As she said this Spike walked into Angels office. "Cos pet I didn't want to hear you bitch about it" he said with a smirk.

Buffy turned and saw spike, he looked as gorgeous as ever. She remembered when he used to look at her; it made her go weak at the knees. His eyes, his cheek bones ….. Buffy stood there starring then came out of her daydream. "Emmm hi" she said

"Hi pet" spike said softly.

Angel looked at spike, he had to spoil everything. He and Buffy were just about to have a proper conversation then Captain Peroxide had to come in a steal the moment.

Buffy looked at angel, "so … the you not dust thing" she said.

"Special glass" angel said. "Got it in my cars as well"

Buffy smiled, "Cars. You mean plural, like more than one?" she asked, she was very impressed.

"Yep" spike said. "Captain Forehead over here has a great big bunch of cars and won't let me have one!" This was one of the things that pissed spike off at the minute. If he had his own car, he could drive over to Buffy's and spy on her. Maybe spy on her wasn't the right word to use. Watch her from a distance? Spike pondered this for a while as he watched Buffy who was looking fabulous.

"That's because spike, you don't work here" angel said

"Well peaches, I don't need a job. I have you" spike said with a smirk.

Buffy smiled a little. She knew Spikes and Angels relationship wasn't good but it was still funny to watch them.

"Now pet, what are you smiling at?" spike asked her as he turned his attention back to Buffy.

"Well you two act like an old married couple" Buffy said with a grin.

Spike and angel didn't reply to this, they just glanced at each other. Angel looked back at Buffy he was about to say something but spike got there first.

"Any way what you doin here love?" spike asked her.

Buffy turned her attention back to spike. "I came to apologise about the other day. I didn't mean to tell you like that. Well I didn't mean to tell you at all as I didn't know you were alive, well un-dead, but … you know what I mean" she said. She was starting to babble and thought it would be best just to stop talking for a bit.

"You don't have to be sorry about anything love." Spike said. "As long as your happy now I suppose that I should be glad."

Buffy didn't say anything; she just looked down at the ground.

Angel watched Buffy. 'Was she happy?' he thought to himself.

Spike looked at her curiously. "Buffy" he said. This caused her to lift her eyes to look back at him. "You are happy aren't you?" he asked.

"Yeah of course" Buffy said she sounded not very believable.

"Some how I don't believe you pet" spike said.

Angel stood up and walked around his desk. He sat down on the other side. Buffy didn't sound very happy.

"I …. Well ….. Lets just say married life isn't as nice as I thought it would be" Buffy said.

Spike watched her. "Maybe its not marriage which is the problem maybe it's the guy who your with" he said. He was unsure whether Buffy would shout at him or not.

"No" Buffy said softly. "He's nice and I love him…"

Spike interrupted her, "but I thought you loved me" he said sounding hurt and a little confused.

"I'll leave you two to it" angel said. He didn't want to hear this. He loved Buffy more than anything but he couldn't listen to spike try and win her back. He walked out of the office and closed the door behind him.

"Finally" spike said as he watched the door close behind angel. "Come and sit down" he told Buffy. He went over to a leather sofa that was near the back of the office and sat down on it. Angel office looked more like an apartment with all the leather arm chairs and the sofa. There was also a big conference table at the end as well. This company must be making a lot of money to have luxury offices like this.

Buffy went and sat down next to spike. She looked into his eyes which were like little pools of blue. Buffy sat uncomfortably on the sofa next to him. She rested her hands on her knees.

Spike could sense how uncomfortable she was. "Buffy" he started, "I know you, and your not happy. This could just be me being jealous or what ever but I want you to be happy."

"I know" Buffy said. "Every things fine its just… now your back I'm confused. I did love you but then you went and I had to be on my own which was hard for while. But then I met Carlo and he loves me".

Spike watched her facial expressions. She didn't seem like a woman who was happily married. He reached out and held one of her hands in his own; he laced his fingers through hers.

Buffy felt the coldness of his hand against hers. His skin was so soft against hers; she looked down at their hands then back up at him.

"Buffy your not happy" spike said simply. He couldn't bear to see her like this. It was like she was a completely different person.

A tear fell down Buffy's face. "I can't do this" she said, she let go of his hand and stood up.

"Do what?" spike asked. He stood up as well and looked down at her.

"Be around you" Buffy said quietly, "its too hard. You were gone and I had to move on, now you're here and I can touch you but Carlo……"

Spike cupped her chin with his hand and gently lifted her head to look at him. "Your not his, you never were" he said.

Another tear fell down Buffy's face. "No" she said quietly. "Please stop….. I can't do this…. I can't let you into my heart again" yet again another tear fell down her face. Thank god she was wearing waterproof mascara.

"I never left" spike said softly as he looked into his eyes. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips and he was surprised that she didn't resist. He pulled away and looked at her.

Buffy opened her eyes, he still took her breathe away. She looked into his eyes. She was silent and didn't say anything.

The couple stood there for a few minutes just starring at each other. Buffy didn't no what to say, but she didn't think she could say anything anyway. Her mind was pulling her in two different directions. One way was Spike, the other way was Carlo.

A ringing shattered the silence. She looked down and remembered her cell phone that was in her jean pocket. The ring tone was Avril Lavigne – nobody's home. The tune filled the air until **B**uffy reached down and took the cell phone out and flipped it open.

"Hello" she said.

"Hi" Carlo said to her.

Oh god. Buffy thought to herself. What was she going to do, she had just kissed spike. She didn't say anything.

"Is there a long line at the store or something?" Carlo asked.

"Huh? What?" Buffy asked confused.

"The store. Your buying food aren't you" Carlo said to his wife.

"Oh yeah" Buffy said. She had forgotten about the excuse to get her out of the house. Now lying to her husband wasn't a good start. One lie always leads to another then another. Then it just ends up as a viscious web of lies that you can never get out of. Buffy felt she wasn't a very good wife. "Yeah there was lots of traffic, I might be a while"

"Ok" Carlo said. "Just checking your ok"

"I'm fine" Buffy said as she looked up at spike who was watching her every move.

"Well I might not be here when you get home. I didn't get that job I was going for so I am going to have another look." He said to her.

"Ok see ya later" Buffy said.

"Love you" Carlo said.

"Love you too" Buffy said to Carlo as she looked at spike. She flipped back the cell phone and replaced it in her pocket.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..


	9. Chapter 9

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter nine – Say you don't love me

Spike looked at Buffy, "Whats gonna happen now pet?" he asked. He didn't want her to go back to Carlo. She belonged with him.

"I have to go" Buffy said. "I should have been back ages ago". Buffy felt her heart telling her to stay, but her head telling her to leave. She was married now, she had made her decision. She couldn't go back and tell Carlo she was leaving him. It would break her heart to see his heart get torn into little pieces.

"Pet, you don't wanna be with him, I can tell." Spike said softly, he reached for her hand but she pulled it away.

Buffy stepped back a little. "Spike, I'm sorry I can't do this"

Spike looked into the eyes. "You deserve to be happy and he can't do that" he said. "We can be happy together."

"We have no future, we tried before and it didn't work" Buffy said. Even though she knew that spike didn't have a soul back then and when he did have a soul he was kind of insane. But she knew this was the right thing to do. She had to the right thing for herself and for everyone else.

"But I'm different now, we are both different now, it can work" spike said. He didn't her to stay with him, he would die without her. She would die without him. Carlo would suck the life and soul out of her. He would drain her of all her passion and energy.

Buffy started to walk towards the door. "No spike. We have to move on, it doesn't work with us."

Spikes stepped in front of her, "Then tell me you don't love me and then you can go back to your husband and you'll never see me again. That's what you want isn't it, so tell me" he said.

Buffy looked up at him. "You know I can't do that" she said. She walked to the door and opened it. She looked back at him.

"Cant do what? Go back or say you don't love me?" spike asked hopefully.

"You know what" Buffy said as she walked out of the office. She walked past angel who was just about to walk in the office. "Bye angel" she said as she started to walk through the lobby.

Spike ran after Buffy and grabbed her arm before she walked out into the bright deadly sunshine. He wished more than anything that he could chase her out into direct sunlight.

Buffy spun around and looked at spike. She tried to shake her arm out of his grip. " let me go please" she said.

"Not until you admit you love me and want to be with me more than him" spike said not letting go of her.

Angel had walked over to talk to harmony when he noticed that spike had gone after Buffy.

Harmony was leaning over her desk to see if she could catch the action. A face off between blondie bear and that slayer whore would have been to die for, harmony thought to her self.

"Just let me go" Buffy shouted and a few people stopped to watch the couple. Buffy pushed him off her.

Spike loosened his grip and let go. "You love me I know it and I'm not gonna let you go off with some Italian wanker" she shouted.

Buffy slapped him hard across the face.

"Yes" harmony said quietly and excitedly. A fight was just the thing she needed to put herself in a god mood.

Angel was also pleased that Buffy had hit spike. He would have done it himself otherwise.

Spike looked at Buffy. "There you are love, back toy your old self" he said with a grin.

"Stop it!" Buffy shouted and punched him again.

But then spike punched her back. He didn't mean to, it was just a reflex.

Buffy put her hand on her cheek. That was going to be swollen she could feel it already. She felt like her eyes were going to explode. Her cheek felt like it was on fire. Spike had hit her … again. Her eyes started to water.

Angel approached them.

"Buffy" spike started but he didn't get a chance to finish.

Buffy turned and ran out of the doors into the beaming midday sun. She ran down the steps, even though she knew that spike couldn't follow her but she still ran. She wanted to get away. She needed to get away. She heard her feet pound against the floor as she ran down the steps and down to the underground parking lot. She fumbled for her keys in her pocket and took hold of them. She opened the door to her car and got in. she locked all the doors of the car from inside as tears streamed down her face. The car was hot and sticky because of the humid temperature outside.

She turned the ignition of the car and soon cold air conditioning engulfed the interior of the car. Buffy wiped her eyes and looked in the mirror of her car. Her cheek was red and a little swollen. She clicked the mirror back into place and pulled out of the parking lot.

Buffy drove around LA for a little. She thought about what her life had come to. The loneliness she had been feeling for so long. Now she was being split down the middle.

Spike had hit her again. She couldn't believe it. She promised herself along time ago she would never let another man hit her. Well a guy she was dating anyway. She couldn't really apply that to the demons she fought every day. But now there were many slayers, she didn't have to do as much slaying, which let her have some degree of a normal life. This was how she met Carlo. Away from all the killing and violence.

A normal guy for a normal girl.

She had tried that before she thought. Riley Finn was supposed to have been that normal guy. And he was, until she found out he was part of a military monster squad which also did experiments on demons and vampires.

This was how spike had changed. He had got a chip implanted in his skull to stop him hurting any human. But he soon found out he could fight demons which led him to fight on Buffys side. This was when their relationship started to grow.

When Buffy had come back from the dead, he was the only person she could talk to. She didn't know why, he was just easier to talk to than her friends. They would never be able to understand. This was when she had started to fall for spike.

But those times were gone and she had to stop dwelling on them. Buffy drove back home in silence. No radio blasted out of her speakers which gave them a well deserved rest.

She got out of the car and walked into the house.

……………………………………………………………………………

Meanwhile at wolfram and hart 

As angel watched Buffy leave he grabbed spike and threw him across the lobby.

Spike hit a brick wall and knocked off a argue picture which crashed to the ground.

Angel walked over to him, pulled him up off the floor and pinned him against the wall.

"Touch her again and I will dust you" angel growled angrily. She put pressure on spikes throat even though he obviously knew it wouldn't kill him.

Spike kicked angel in the stomach and took in an un-needed breathe. He glared at angel. "You think I meant to hit you prick?" spike asked.

Angel didn't reply.

"It was a reflex" spike continued. "If some one hits you, you hit em back. I couldn't stop myself. It was over before I could do anything about it." He said

"That's your problem spike. That's why you shouldn't be around Buffy." Angel said.

"That's just coz you wanna steal her off me you bastard. She is mine and stop telling me what to do." Spike said and he adjusted his trade mark leather jacket and walked off down one of wolfram and harts many corridors.

Angel walked off back to his office.


	10. Chapter 10

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 10 – Unexpected visitors 

Buffy walked into the hallway and closed the door behind her.

"Carlo!" she shouted, the house was silent. He must not be home yet. Buffy ran u the stairs to the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. Her cheek was getting worse. Spike had hit her quite hard. But he hadn't meant to. Some where inside she knew this, spike would never hurt her intentionally. Buffy applied cover up to her swollen cheek to cover it up. She didn't want Carlo to see it.

It was sun down when Carlo walked through the front door.

Buffy was making dinner in the kitchen. She wasn't a very good cook but she thought she would try. She was attempting to make spaghetti bolognaise. But it didn't look like the picture in the recipe book.

Carlo walked into the kitchen. "Hi" he said to her. He placed a shopping bag on the counter.

Buffy turned around to greet her husband with a hug. She felt guilty about what had happened with spike. She couldn't tell him. She had to keep it a secret.

"How was your day?" Carlo asked her.

Buffy smiled. "Boring" she said. Even though the day had been very eventful. "How was yours?" she asked

"it was ok. Finding a job here is harder than I expected" Carlo said. "But I guess I don't have to get a job yet. I have enough money for us to live for while. I want to spend as much time with you as I can" he replied and kissed her soft lips.

Buffy pulled away, she felt uncomfortable. "That's sweet" she said with a smile. She looked over at the stove. "Look I am cooking" she said.

Carlo looked over at the stove as well. "Emmm what is it?" he asked. Italians are very particular about their food, especially pasta.

"Its spaghetti bolognaise. I know it doesn't look like it but I'm sure it will taste fine" she said with a smile. "If not, we both die with food poisoning. I did tell you before we got married that I can't cook right?"

Carlo smiled. "Yeah, many times" he said. "But it doesn't matter"

There was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it" Buffy said. She pulled away from Carlo and walked out of the kitchen. "Watch the spaghetti" she shouted as she walked into the hallway.

Buffy pulled open the front door and saw spike standing there. She stepped outside and pulled the door closed behind her. "What are you doing here?" she asked in a whisper.

"I came to see you, tell you I'm sorry for hitting you" spike said.

"shhhh" she said, "Carlo will hear you. He's just inside. And I know you didn't mean to hit me so I accept your apology and now go away"

"No" spike said. "I want you to come back to wolfram and hart with me and leave that ponce of a husband of yours. You know you belong with me" he said softly as he ran his fingers through Buffy's hair. He looked into her eyes.

Buffy looked up at him. "I can't. It would kill him if I left. I can't do that to him, he loves me so much and I love him".

"No you don't, I can tell" spike said, "He's the re-bound guy. And I'm here now, so come back to me" he said. He stepped forward towards her. The porch light illuminated his perfect face.

Buffy looked up into his eyes, not saying a word.

What was she going to do? She knew she had to choose.

Spike or Carlo

She couldn't do it. Why was her life never simple?

Spike kissed her on the lips softly just unaware of the door opening next to him. Even if he did know, he probably wouldn't of stopped.

Buffy put her arms around him as they kissed.

Carlos looked at the couple on his door step. For a second he didn't realise it was his wife kissing some stranger. But it was no stranger. This man had been at his house before, Buffy's ex spike.

Buffy pulled away when she realised Carlo was standing right next to her. She looked at her husband. "Carlo" she started. But she couldn't finish.

Carlo had lunged forward and grabbed spike. He threw him across the front lawn and started punching him in the face.

Buffy ran over to her husband and pulled him off spike.

Spike immediately stood up and was about to go for Carlo when Buffy stopped him.

"Please stop it" Buffy said.

"Get inside Buffy" Carlo said angrily. "Me and this … him … need to sort this out"

"What? No!" Buffy said. "No one is fighting."

One of the reasons Buffy didn't want fighting was because she knew that Carlo would loose. Spike was a vampire; he had super strength and skill that Carlo would never have. Spike would just end up beating Carlo to a bloody pulp right in front of her and she didn't want that.

Spike stood still on the spot looking at Carlo. If he wanted Buffy back, killing her husband wasn't one of the best ways to win her back. Even though that was his last resort. He looked down at the earth below him. If Buffy told him to go away again he hoped the earth would open and swallow him whole. Life without Buffy was torture.

Carlo turned to look at his wife. "Why were you kissing him?" he asked.

"I ….." Buffy started, she looked at spike then Carlo. "I don't know".

"I do" spike said eagerly. "Because she loves me not you, you wanker"

"Shut up" Carlo said. He looked at Buffy, "if you love him just tell me now. I don't want anymore lying."

Buffy looked at Carlo. "I do love him, but I love you as well" she said, trying to make him understand.

"Ha" spike said happily when she admitted she loved him in front of Carlo. He decided to block out the part when she said she loved him too.

"You don't love me Buffy" Carlo said sadly. "Just go be with him"

"Yes Buffy, come and be with me" spike repeated.

"No" Buffy said, "I'm married to you. I'm your wife". She couldn't believe that Carlo was saying this.

"No your not" Carlo said. "I want a divorce"

…………………………………………………………………………………


	11. Chapter 11

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

**Chapter 11 – falling apart **

I must be dreaming, Buffy thought to herself. She looked up at Carlo. "What? No" Buffy said. She felt like her world was falling apart all over again. "We can sort this out" she said. She felt a cold tear fall down her face.

Spike watched her. His heart ached when he saw her in pain, especially when he caused it. But he wanted to be with her. He couldn't let her spirit die with him; he knew he could make her happy.

"No we can't. If all your going to think about is him then no" Carlo said coldly to his wife, or soon to be ex-wife.

"Carlo, don't you love me is that it?" Buffy asked as more tears fell down her face. Yet another man was leaving her and yet again it was her fault.

Carlo looked into Buffy's teary eyes. "I love you, but you don't love me so this cant work." He said.

"But I do love you, I do. I don't know how I can prove this to you" Buffy said.

"You have already shown me that you love him. So go…" Carlo said as he reached into his pocket. He took out a pair of keys. "I got you a present earlier, take it to good use" he said. He handed Buffy a set of car keys.

Buffy turned around and just noticed the red sports car on the drive. She hadn't noticed it with all the drama going on. He had bought her a car of her own. She turned back to Carlo. Before she could say anything he turned around and started walking back into the house.

"Come back for your stuff in the morning" Carlo said, he went into the hall and grabbed Buffy's hand bag and jacket. He laid them down on the door step, glanced at Buffy and spike then closed the front door.

As the door closed Buffy fell to her knees. It was all too much for her to handle. As she cried she clutched the keys tightly until her hand started to bleed. She didn't care; she didn't feel the pain in her hand, just the pain in her heart. She felt like a large black hole had just appeared and was taking the world away. Her neck felt tight as more tears fell down her cheeks.

Spike didn't know what to do. He watched Buffy and then walked over to the front door and picked up her jacket and bag. He carried them over to her and knelt down on the grass next to her. He placed the bag and jacket on the floor next to her.

Buffy lifted her tear stained face to look at her former lover. She didn't know what to do.

"Buffy" spike said gently. "Are you ok luv?" he knew it was a stupid question to ask as soon as the words passed his lips. Of course she wasn't alright.

Buffy stood up slowly, her legs felt weak and her head was spinning. "Do I seem ok to you?" she sobbed as another gush of tears rolled down her cheeks. She heart was breaking all over again.

Spike stood up, her bag and jacket in hand. "I…." he started.

Buffy interrupted him. "Don't you dare say your sorry coz I will beat you down" she said angrily.

"I didn't mean for it to go this way" spike said.

"Well it has ok." Buffy said. "I've lost everything. Are you happy now? Do you want me to be like this, hoping that I'll fall back into your arms". Buffy felt dizzy, the work was spinning and she couldn't focus her eyes.

Everything went black.

Spike caught her as she fell. And that's exactly what she did, fall into his arms. He placed her on the ground to check she was ok. She was still breathing. All the shock must have over took her. He looked down at her for a moment then picked her up and carried her back to his car. He placed her gently in the passenger seat and thought about hat to do. Maybe he should take her back to wolfram and hart. Carlo obviously wasn't going to take her back so he would have to.

Spike placed Buffys things on the back seat and started the engine. He drove back to wolfram and hart thinking about what he was going to do next. He glanced at Buffy as he drove. She looked beautiful even though her face was wet from her tears.

Spike drove into the under ground parking lot and turned off the engine. What to do? He thought. Spike got out of the car taking Buffys things with her. She went around the other side of the car and opened her door. He gently lifted her out of the car and locked the car. He walked up to an elevator and he went up into the building. As the doors opened he stepped out. He was on the apartment floor where wolfram and hart had many apartments for Angels guests to stay.

Spike found an empty apartment and walked in, closing the door behind him. The apartment was quite big. Nearly as big as Angels. Spike walked into the bedroom and placed her on her bed. He put her jacket and bag on a chair near the window. He turned around and looked at her. She was illuminated by the moonlight. He glanced down at her bleeding hand. He walked into the bathroom and got a damp cloth. He walked back over to her and sat down on the bed next to her. He cleaned her blood stained hand and then kissed her on the forehead. He left her to sleep.

………………………………………..

Next morning at wolfram and hart.

Buffy woke up slowly. As she opened her eyes she felt the sting of the morning sunshine and immediately closed them again. She was confused. She tried opening her eyes again and sat up on the bed. She rubbed her eyes and looked around the unfamiliar room. Where was she?

She looked over at a chair which had her jacket and bag on it. She wasn't at home. Oh god what happened last night. She silently prayed that it was a dream and that Carlo would walk through the door any second. She waited and no one came. She got up off the bed and adjusted her clothes.

Buffy felt a sting in her hand. She lifted her hand to eye level and noticed some deep cuts. She looked down at the bed side table and noticed the set of keys that Carlo had given her. It wasn't a dream. They were covered in blood. All the memories of the previous evening came flooding back to her.

Buffy looked up as the bedroom door opened and in walked spike.

Spike was surprised to see her awake. "Hello pet" he said softly.

Buffy didn't say anything. Now she was even more confused. Spike was here. She hoped they didn't do anything last night that would mess up everything even more.

"I didn't think you'd be awake" spike said. "How you feelin?"

"Emmm" Buffy said, "That's a difficult question. I don't know"

Spike only nodded and walked over to her.

Buffy sat back down on the bed and spike sat next to her. They sat in silence for a while, occasionally glancing at each other.

"I guess what happened last night wasn't a nightmare then. It did actually happen" Buffy said looking at Spike.

Spike nodded, he knew the reason for Buffys unhappiness was him. He had caused all of this pain for her.

"Where am I then?" Buffy asked. "Is this your place?" she looked around the room. Maybe spike had once eaten a decorator. It was very posh.

"No" spike laughed. "This is wolfram and hart".

"The law firm angel is in charge of?" Buffy asked

"Yeah pet" spike confirmed as he looked at her golden hair shine in the bright sunlight.

Buffy nodded, she stood up again. "What am I going to do? Carlo is divorcing me" she said. She started to pace up and down along side of the bed.

"Luv if you keep doing that you'll wear a hole in the big poofs posh carpet. One second thoughts carry on" spike said as he watched Buffy pace. She paced when she was nervous or thinking about something really carefully.

Buffy stopped and looked at spike. "What am I going to do?" she asked him. She knew she wouldn't get any good advice from him. She knew all he wanted was her.

"Don't ask me luv" spike said. "I know what I want you to do. But I guess you have to decide yourself." Spike said.

"And that's what I was doing last night? Deciding for myself when you came to my house and then …. Well you know ….." she said.

"Yeah pet, I know what I did. That's because I want and need you to be with me. You know some where inside that its true." Spike said. "We're soul mates Buffy".

Buffy sat down next to spike. "Spike you know I love you but I'm… well was married. And I do love Carlo"

"But not as much as you love me" spike interrupted.

Buffy looked down, "I don't know" she said. "But I guess I'm not married anymore. Well soon wont be coz Carlo wants to get rid of me ASAP" she said.

Spike put a hand on her knee. "Is that a bad thing?" he asked.

"Don't ask me that question spike" Buffy said quietly.

Spike didn't reply to her.

Buffy stood up. "I need to think so I'm going to go shower ok" she said.

Spike nodded. "I can find you some clean clothes to wear until you get yours" he said.

"Thanks" Buffy said with a half smile. She walked off into the bathroom and spike left the apartment.


	12. Chapter 12

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

**Chapter 12 – falling down**

About an hour later, spike knocked on the apartment door where Buffy was staying,

Buffy walked to the door and opened it. "Hi" she said to spike as he walked into the room. "I was thinking I could go home and get my stuff as Carlo doesn't want me around."

"Emmm yeah" spike said. "That seems like a good idea". He was so happy that Buffy was finally leaving Carlo.

"I kinda need a lift as I have no car. Well I have a car but it's at the house" Buffy said

"Yeah pet course I will take you" spike said.

Buffy smiled and nodded. "Ok lets go" she said. She went to get her jacket and handbag.

Spike waited in the hallway for Buffy then they left wolfram and hart.

The car journey was quiet.

Buffy wondered whether Carlo would be at home, hopefully he was at home then she could sort this mess out. She occasionally went into a day dream about him forgiving her then everything would be perfect again. They would live happily ever after.

Spike was already planning his and Buffys future together. He didn't think that Carlo would take Buffy back, which for him was good. Spike thought about everything that he and Buffy could have together; nice house, flashy cars and Buffy being with him always. Captain forehead would be out of their lives forever and it would be perfect.

Spike pulled up at the house. "Shall I wait here luv?" he asked Buffy.

Buffy thought for a moment. "Yeah, all my stuff might not fit in my new car. Which I may not even have any more. Carlo might decide to take it back I dunno." She said

"Ok I'll wait here" spike said.

Buffy got out of the car and walked up the gravel driveway to the house. Everything looked normal, just as she left it. She was unsure whether to use her key or to knock. It was still her house so she took out her keys and walked in the house, closing the door behind her. She placed her handbag on a little table by the door. Buffy heard a radio playing upstairs. She walked up the staircase and went into the bedroom.

Carlo was sitting on the bed listening to the radio and reading a book. He stood up as he saw Buffy. "Hi" Carlo said plainly.

"Hey" Buffy said. "Are we emmm"

"Yes we are still getting a divorce" Carlo said. "I don't want you here if all you are going to think about is him" he said.

"I won't" Buffy said, "I promise"

Carlo walked over to her. "And what about the promises you made on our wedding day, don't they mean anything. Maybe you just forgot when you let Spike put his tongue down your throat" he was very angry.

"I'm sorry" Buffy said, "I really am"

"I don't care" Carlo said. "I just want you out of my life"

"No" Buffy said. "We can work this out. I'm not leaving until you listen to me."

"I really don't care anymore Buffy" Carlo said. He grabbed Buffys arm. "Come back another day for your things". He started to pull her out of the bedroom and pulled her towards the stairs to get her out of the house.

"No!" Buffy shouted. She pushed Carlo off her.

Carlo stumbled on the stairs. Then tripped and fell all the way down the stairs, rolling and occasionally banging his head on the steps as he fell. The sound of thudding rang in Buffys ears.

"Carlo!" Buffy shouted. She looked down the stairs and saw Carlos mangled body lying on the hard wood floor. "Oh my god" Buffy said. She ran down the stairs and knelt down next to Carlo. There was a pool of crimson blood around his head that was getting bigger and bigger. Silence filled the house.

Buffy checked for a pulse. She waited …..

But couldn't find one.

"I killed him" Buffy said, "Oh god. I killed Carlo".


	13. Chapter 13

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 13 – Burying the past

Spike had been waiting in the car for awhile now. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel whilst looking up at the house. He hoped Carlo hadn't forgiven Buffy. He wanted to be with her.

He sighed and looked up at the glowing sun. That was the only thing that stopped him walking into the house. The special glass that was in wolfram and hart was also in the car. He loved to drive when it was sunny. He looked a bit pale, compared to everyone else, but at least he could look up and see the sun.

Spike reached into the back of the car and pulled out a big grey blanket. He would have to go inside. He covered himself with the blanket, making sure his flesh wasn't showing. He got out the car and ran up to the house. Spike sprinted across the lawn and ran into the house. He closed the door behind him and pulled off the blanket. He looked around the hallway then saw Buffy; she was kneeling down on the ground next to Carlo.

"Buffy" he said.

Buffy didn't reply. All spike could hear were quiet sobs.

Spike went over to her and knelt down next to her. He saw the pool of blood around Carlo's head. "What happened?" he asked

Buffy didn't look at spike. Her eyes were fixed on Carlo. "I killed him" she said quietly.

With spikes vampire hearing, he heard her words perfectly. He didn't say anything, he looked down at Carlos mangled body.

Buffy turned her head to look at Spike. "I pushed him. He tried to get me out of the house so I pushed him" she said. Her tear flooded eyes dropped back to Carlo's body.

Spike thought for a moment. "Buffy" he said, "We have to get you away from here. And we need to do something with the body". He wasn't going to let Buffy go to jail. She was a good person. It was an accident. He saw how distressed she was.

"I can't go" Buffy said quietly. "I killed him……"

"No" spike said. "Buffy you cant. The cops will soon find out he's missing and you will be suspect number one. Your not going to prison, I wont let you."

"Let them find me. I did it. I shouldn't just walk away" Buffy said looking back at spike.

Spike took Buffys arm and pulled her up standing. Her body was life less. He turned her to look at him. "I'll fix it ok" he said.

"How can you?" she asked. "I killed him it can never be ok"

Spike looked down at Carlo's body. They needed to dispose of the body. Carlo was quite a big guy and wouldn't be moved easily. Another problem was that it was daylight.

"Buffy" spike said.

Buffy didn't look at him. Maybe she didn't hear him.

"Buffy" spike repeated.

Buffy turned her head to look at spike again. "Emmm yeah" she said dazed.

"Is there a basement?" spike asked. He knew what he had to do.

"Yeah" Buffy said, "why?"

"We need to sort this out pet" spike said. He went over to Carlo and picked the body up. "Show me"

Buffy slowly walked into the kitchen and opened a door which led down to the basement. She walked down the steps slowly and spike followed, carrying Carlo in his arms.

As they reached the bottom of the stairs, spike looked around. This would do perfect. The ground beneath his feet was soft; it would make a perfect grave.

Spike strode over to a work bench to look for a spade or something to dig with.

Buffy was leaning against the cold stone wall with her eyes fixed on Carlo.

Spike found a spade and went over to the middle of the room. He started to dig hole in the ground.

……………………………………………..

About half an hour later, the hole was big enough to fit Carlo in. Spike walked over to Carlo and pulled him into the hole.

Buffy winced as she heard the thud of Carlo hitting the bottom of the hole.

Spike started to cover over Carlo with the dirt.

Buffy watched spike closely. What had she done?

Spike threw the spade across the room and looked at Buffy. He walked over to her and touched her arm. She winced away. Her eyes were now fixed on Carlo's grave.

"Buffy come on" Spike said. She held her hand and walked her up the stairs.

When they got to the kitchen Buffy sat down on a stool. "What am I going to do?" she asked.

Spike looked at her. She was so upset; he couldn't bear to see her like this. It was just like when she thought she had killed Katrina, but it was just a trick that Warren and the other members of the trio had put on Buffy.

"I don't know what your going to do pet. But I don't think you should stay here" spike said. "The house will mess with your head. And I am speaking from personal experience."

"Yeah I guess" Buffy said quietly, "can I come back to Wolfram and Hart with you?" she said.

"Course you can pet" spike said softly. "Go get your stuff"

Buffy walked quietly upstairs and soon returned with a suitcase full of clothes that would last her for the next couple of days.

Spike was waiting in the hallway for her. "Come on then luv" he said. he took the suitcase out of Buffys hand.

Buffy picked up her handbag and the car keys. "I'm …. I'm gonna take my new car" she said.

Spike looked at her. "I don't think your in a state to drive pet" he said.

"Don't tell me what to do" Buffy snapped. She walked out the front door. By now the sun had set, the sky was filled with pinks and oranges. Clouds swirled across the sky like candy floss as the orange ball of flames sunk down below view.

Spike watched her walk out the door hen followed closely behind her.

"I'll see you at wolfram and hart" she told him as she got into her new red sports car that Carlo had got her.

Spike walked back to his car and put Buffys bag in the trunk. He watched her as she screeched out from the driveway and down the road. He got into his car and drove back to wolfram and hart, hoping that Buffy would be ok.

…………………………………………………………………………………………


	14. Chapter 14

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 14 – crash and burn 

Buffy drove down the busy street. The head lights from cars driving in the opposite direction burned her tear stained eyes. She concentrated on the road ahead. The sound of car radios that blared out from all around her deafened her.

Buffy kept her hands tightly on the steering wheel. She gripped with unbelievable force that the wheel might come off soon. She glanced around at the people around her. Happy families coming back from a nice family meal. Couples chatting and smiling at each other.

She was alone, as usual. That was the price of being a slayer. But she had been happy for a while with Carlo. She had a taste of a normal life and she liked it. But that was gone. She had destroyed everything. She always did that. Why? She asked herself. Maybe she subconsciously wanted to be alone. Spike had once told her that she needed the pain. She was starting to understand that. Maybe she didn't want to be happy. She might not be able to be completely happy. What could give her as much peace as heaven had.

Buffy began to have flashbacks; first of her pushing Carlo down the stairs. Next, of her watching spike bury him. Spike must have cared about her a lot to do that for her. She constantly saw Carlo's face. His shocked scared eyes that looked up at her.

Buffy shook her head a little to try and get the image away. The image wouldn't disappear. All she saw was his face. His cold dead eyes gazing at her. Buffy shook her head more.

"No No No, go away!" Buffy shouted. She closed her eyes tightly. When she opened them she was on the other side of the road. She saw two large headlights rolling towards her. She had no time to move out of the way.

SMASH

Everything went black.

Buffy's car was smashed up. There was a spark and it suddenly was on fire. The truck driver wasn't injured, just a little shaken. His truck had not a lot of damage. The front bumper was a little dented but not as much as Buffys car.

All the traffic screeched to a holt.

A few people got out of their cars and rushed over to Buffys car. They looked inside and saw her sitting in the driver seat.

The flames were getting bigger.

One man opened Buffys door and undid her seat belt. He pulled her out of the car and another man went to help him pull away from the flames.

The emergency services soon arrived.

…………………………………………………………………………..

Hospital

Buffy opened one eyes slowly. She was confronted with bright light and immediately closed it again. She groaned.

Spike was sitting in a chair next to her bed. His head shot up to look at her. He held her hand gently.

"Buffy" he said, hoping that she was going to reply.

Buffy didn't open her eyes. "Spike?" she said quietly and slowly.

"Yeah pet I'm here" he said softly with a sigh of relief.

What happened? Buffy thought to herself. She couldn't really remember. She remembered driving the car. But everything was … nothing.

Buffy slowly opened her eyes. The clouds had covered the sun so it was a little dimmer. She turned her head a little. It hurt her and she moaned in pain. She looked at spike. His blue eyes gazed at her. She smiled a little.

"Where am I?" Buffy asked with a little cough.

"You're in the hospital. You had a car crash pet" spike said to her.

Buffy looked at him in confusion. Then it all rushed back to her. What she was thinking before she saw those two big head lights.

"Oh" she said. "I remember". She closed her eyes for a second. A tear fell down her face.

Spike wiped it gently away. "Its ok luv" he said softly to her.

Buffy didn't reply to him. She was deep in thought.

"I better go tell the doctor you're awake" spike told her and h stood up from his chair. He had been sitting by her side for the past two days.

Angel had got word of a car crash involving a young blonde woman. He immediately thought of Buffy and phoned the hospital to check. Once he found out it was her he was about to leave for the hospital when spike walked in the office. He had heard the conversation angel had had with the hospital receptionist.

They had argued for about half an hour over who was going to see Buffy. Finally they agreed they would both go. It was a quite pointless argument but due to the two vampires history it couldn't be helped.

Spike soon returned with the doctor who went over to the monitors by Buffys bed. He did a few tests where they shine a light in her eye and she followed it.

"How are you feeling?" the doctor asked her.

"Like I have been in a giant washing machine filled with knives" Buffy said. That exactly how she felt. She had pain all over her body.

"Well that's to be expected. I didn't think you would wake up so soon." The doctor said. "You were in a major car accident Miss Summers."

Buffy listened to everything the doctor had to say. He soon left after giving her soon pills that she had to take.

Spike sat back down. "Peaches is outside. Only one visitor at a time so he is kinda pissed" he said with a smirk. "But I thought whose face you would like to wake up to. His or mine?"

Buffy smiled a little.

"So of course I chose me" he said with a smirk.

"I guess that's ok with me" she said. She paused. "How long have I been in here?" she asked him.  
"a couple of days" spike replied. "I was worried about you for a bit. But I knew my girl would pull through. You always do."

"Yeah I do don't I" she said softly, remembering all the times she had escaped death or come back from it.

They both sat there talking for while. Spike didn't bring up the Carlo issue. He thought she had enough to deal with right now. She didn't need all the worry to come back. He had sorted it, nothing more to say.

Angel had swapped with spike for a little while. He checked if she was ok and they talked for a while as well.

After about thirty minutes a nurse came in to tell them visiting hours were over. Angel said good bye and spike came back in.

"We better be off" spike told her. "I'll be back tomorrow. Hopefully not with Captain Forehead"

"Hes ok" Buffy said with a little smiled. She yawned, she was so tired.

Spike leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. "See you later luv" he said. He walked out of Buffys hospital room and went back to wolfram and hart.

Buffy was left alone in the now dark room. The only light was the moon light coming through the curtains. She looked at the ceiling thinking about her three guys. Carlo, Angel and Spike.


	15. Chapter 15

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 15 – Feeling better 

Buffy had been in the hospital for a couple of days now. She had regular visits from angel and spike who brought her flowers everyday. Her room was filled with vases of flowers. It was lucky that she didn't get hay fever other wise she would be sneezing all day. Buffy was able to get out of hospital today. Due to her slayer healing she was nearly fully recovered.

Spike had told angel about what had happened to Carlo then angel had insisted that she stay at wolfram until she found anew place to live. Buffy had decided she couldn't go back to her house and live. It wouldn't take long to sell; it was a nice big house. And as long as no one found out that there was a man buried in the basement.

Buffy was sitting up in her uncomfortable hospital bed. There was a knock on the door and the doctor walked in.

Buffy gave a weak smile. Even though she hated hospitals, her doctor was ok.

"Hello Miss Summers." The doctor said with a smile, "Your happy about going home today?" he asked her.

"Yeah I am. Cant wait to get out of here." Buffy said with a smile.

"Yeah a lot of people think like that" he said. He handed her a clipboard. "There are just a couple of forms that you need to sign and then you can be on your way".

Buffy took the board and took a pen off her bedside table. She signed on the dotted lines at the bottom of the pages. "Thanks" she said as she handed it back.

"I hope not to see you again" he said with a smile, and walked out of the room.

Buffy smiled as she knew what he meant. Buffy got out of the bed and stepped onto the cold floor. She walked over to a bag with her clothes in and got changed. She collected her things up from around the room and put them all in the big bag. Spike had brought her some of her stuff in this bag. Buffy slipped on her flip flops and put her hair in a loose pony tail. She really couldn't be bothered to make her self look nice. Her whole body ached, but it wasn't as bad as it was at first.

There was another knock at the door.

"Come in" Buffy said.

Spike walked through the door followed by angel. "Hey" they both said.

Buffy smiled at her two favourite guys. "Hey" she said.

"You ready to go luv?" spike asked her.

"Yeah I think so" Buffy said.

"Good" spike said and he took the bag out of Buffys hand.

"Thanks" Buffy said. She didn't think she could carry that long. Her arms were hurting. She went over to the bed side table and took some of the packets of tablets that the morning nurse had left for her.

"Come on then" angel said as he left the room followed by spike then Buffy.

They walked out of the hospital in silence. They went down to the underground car park and went over to a black shiny range rover.

Spike put the bag in the back of the car and helped Buffy into the front passenger seat. He got in the back of the car whilst angel got into the drivers seat.

Buffy sighed as she relaxed into the comfortable leather of the car. She looked out of the window as angel pulled out into the street. She felt a little uneasy about being in car. But she closed her eyes trying to think of something else.

"You ok pet?" spike asked her as he leaned forward from the back seat.

"Yeah I'm ok, just tired" Buffy said.

"You can sleep all you want when we get back to wolfram and hart, the apartment is ready for you."

Buffy opened her eyes and nodded. "Thanks a lot angel, I really appreciate it" she said with a smile.

Spike leaned back in his seat feeling a little jealous.

They soon arrived at wolfram and hart and spike helped buffy out of the car before angel could. He also got her bag from the back of the car. They walked over to the elevator which took them to the lobby. Angel stepped out.

"Ive got some work to do if you don't mind. But I'll see you later" angel said. "Try and get some rest Buffy"

Buffy nodded and smiled. "Thanks" she said as the elevator doors closed. They went up a couple more floors and arrived at a long corridor where her apartment was.

Spike and Buffy stepped out together and walked down the corridor until they arrived at the apartment that she stayed in before. Spike opened the door for her and walked in. he followed her in and put her bag down by the door. Buffy went into the living room and sat down on the big red sofa.

"Wow this is nice. You sink into it" Buffy said with a smile. The sofa was extremely comfortable. It must have cost a lot of money.

Spike smiled and went to sit down next to her. Buffy looked at him.

"How are you feeling?" spike asked her.

"I'm good" she said with a smiled as she got comfortable on the sofa.

"Really?" he asked her. Some how he didn't believe her.

"Yeah, I mean I kinda ache. But apart from that I'm good" she said with a shrug.

Spike nodded. He didn't want to push her.

"I wanna thank you for looking after me and coming to see me in hospital and everything" Buffy said.

"I'd do anything for you pet, you know that" spike said to her. He moved some hair out of her eyes.

Buffy nodded and she looked at spike. He always knew how to make her feel a little bit better. She got up off the sofa and looked around the room.

Spike stood up also and he adjusted his trade mark leather duster. He watched as her head dropped to the floor.

Buffy thought for a moment, then lifted her face to meet his gaze. For once he was silent, none of his sarcasm or his charm.

Spike stepped closer to her.

Their lips touched briefly and then Buffy took his hand and led him to the bedroom.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….


	16. Chapter 16

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I cant use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 16 – Did we … you know?

Buffy opened her eyes slowly and met darkness. She felt a soft pillow under her head and a warm cover over her body. She looked at a clock that was on the bedside table. The green numbers that glowed in the dark told her that it was 10pm. She yawned a little then turned her head and saw spike lying next to her asleep. Her eyes froze, what had happened? She asked herself in confusion. She lifted the cover a little and noticed she was naked. 'Oh god' she thought as she covered herself more with the cover. 'What have I done' Things from earlier in the day started to come back to her.

"Oh god" she said out loud this time. She slid out of the bed slowly and walked across the room and found a dressing gown on the back of the door. She pulled it around her and tied the rope loosely around her waist.

Spike stirred.

Buffy stood perfectly still as spike reached out an arm to the empty bed next to him.

Spike opened his eyes when he found Buffy wasn't in the bed next to him. He sat up slowly and glanced around the big dark room. He saw Buffy standing by the door. The moonlight just touching her feet. He leaned back against the head board, "You ok luv?" he asked her.

"Emm I dunno" Buffy said.

Spike watched her, "why whats up pet?" he asked her. The moonlight was on his face making a perfect spot light.

"Did we…. You know" Buffy said not finishing her sentence.

Spike grinned a little, "yeah luv" he said.

"Oh" she said looking down at the ground.

Spike got out of bed and pulled on his jeans. He walked over to Buffy who was still looking at the ground. He put a hand on her shoulder gently. "Hey luv" he said gently.

Buffy looked up into his eyes but didn't say anything.

"You know I love you" spike said. "And I know you love me to, so maybe we could just try and work things out between us. Have a fresh start"

"I don't know. I'm not sure why I …..We ……" Buffy didn't finish because there was a knock on the apartment door.

"You want me to go?" spike asked her as he let go of her shoulder.

"No its ok, I'll go" she said as she walked out of the bedroom.

Spike sat down on the bed.

Buffy walked into the hall way and opened the door. Light spilled into the dimly lit hallway and living room  
. Buffy had to wait a moment for her eyes to adjust to the light.

She looked at the man standing in the doorway, it was Carlos.


	17. Chapter 17

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 17 – He returns.

"Carlos" Buffy said in shocked. She looked at him, he looked terrible. His clothes were torn and black with dirt. His flesh was cut which caused blood to run down his face and arms. He looked like a zombie. Maybe that's what he was Buffy thought. Carlos eyes were glowing red, which Buffy noticed straight away.

She stepped backwards. He mustn't have been human, he was dead. She had been sure of it.

"Hello Buffy" Carlos said in a low voice. He stepped into the apartment and closed the door behind him.

Before Buffy had a chance to move away from him anymore, Carlos had grabbed her by the throat. He pushed her against the wall, his throat still tight around her throat.

Buffy was chocking, she couldn't breathe. She tried to call out for spike but she couldn't, no sound came out of her mouth.

Spike had been waiting in the bedroom for Buffy to return. He started to wonder where she was and got up from the bed and walked into the living room. He sensed someone else in the room. He looked around the dark room, his vampire sight helped him. He could see perfectly. Then he saw him holding Buffy by the throat against the wall.

"You thought you could just get rid of me?" Carlos asked Buffy. "I'll never leave, not even if you kill me". Buffy's eyes widened those words seemed familiar.

"Yeah right" spike said as he grabbed Carlos by the neck and threw him across the room. Carlos hit a giant painting and fell to the floor.

As soon as Carlos had let go of Buffy she dropped to the floor, she took in a deep breath.

Spike knelt down next to Buffy he glanced back at Carlos who was still lying on the floor. "Buffy" he said.

Buffy eyes focused on Spike, she took a few more deep breaths then she felt fine. She was confused though. Carlos was dead, she killed him. How was he there?

'Oh god. I've fallen for another demon. What is wrong with me? Am I some kind of demon magnet? No that's Xander, how could I forget. But no it must be me. Angel, Spike and now Carlos.' Buffy thought to herself as she stood up slowly, with the help of spike.

Carlos was soon on his feet. "If I can't have her, no one will have her" he said angrily and he ran to spike and kicked him hard in the stomach but spike was quick to fight back.

Buffy wanted to help but when ever she got close, she backed away. 'Whats wrong with me?' Buffy thought.

"I'm going to kill her" Carlos shouted in a low Italian accent. He punched spike again but spike punched him back twice as hard.

"Not in this life time" spike said as he knocked Carlos out. He lay motionless on the carpet. Once spike was sure Carlos was out cold he went over to Buffy.

"Come on" spike said. "We have to get you out of here". He took her hand ready to take her out of the room.

Buffy shook off his hand. "No" she said. "I want to know how he is here, it makes no sense. You saw him before. He was dead!"

"Buffy you'll be dead if you stay here. Come on I have to take you somewhere safe." Spike said, he took her hand again and led her out of the apartment.

As they walked out Buffy looked at Carlos, then spike closed the door behind them. They walked down the corridor and went inside the elevator. Spike quickly pressed the button and the elevator doors closed.

Buffy leaned against the wall of the elevator. She looked at spike, he had a bloody nose.

"I'm sorry" Buffy said.

Spike wiped the blood from his nose. "Its ok pet" he said. "It's not like I haven't been in a fight before".

"But you fought to protect me, that's different" Buffy said.

"I would fight all the demons in the world for you pet, or husbands in this case "Spike replied. He put an arm around Buffy. He was wondering where they could go to keep her safe.

Suddenly the lift came to a halt and the bright lights in the lift switched off. "Oh bugger not again" he said. The backup lights came on.

Buffy looked around worriedly. "This happens a lot?" she said.

"Not really luv" spike said, "just once for me. But last time I was a ghost"

"A ghost?" Buffy asked. 'Did I know this?' Buffy asked herself. Everything with spike just blended in together.

Spike went over to the emergency call button. "ello" he said into the small microphone, hoping that some one on the other end would reply.

There was silence for a moment.

"I told you that I'd never leave" Carlos said, and then the line went dead.

"oh god. What is he?" Buffy said, "I can't believe I married a demon".

Spike looked at Buffy. "Come on" he said, "we av to get out of here". Spike looked around the small elevator. He noticed a hatch in the roof.

"right ok." He said to himself. "Come on luv. We are getting out from there"

Buffy looked up and noticed the emergency hatch. "Ok", she went over to spike.

Spike put his arms around and picked her up. He looked into her eyes briefly then lifted her higher so she could reach the hatch.

Buffy opened the hatch then pulled herself up out onto the top of the lift. She sat on the top for a moment and then watched spike climb out him self.

Spike closed the hatch again then looked around the dark shaft. He saw another lift at the top and noticed it was moving. "Carlos only cut off out lift", he told Buffy.

The lift slowly started to move down next to them. "pet, we have to jump to the roof of the next lift ok" he said.

"Emmm ok" Buffy said. her mind was so full of different thought right now.

As the lift levelled next to them they both jumped onto the roof then. Buffy opened the hatch on the other lift and climbed in. spike followed after her.

A couple of lawyers were in the lift already. They gave Buffy and spike a couple of weird looks.

"what?" spike asked them defensively.

The lift doors opened and everyone walked out quickly.

Buffy glanced around looking for any sign of Carlos. she couldn't see him. "come on" she said to spike. "I need to get some sort of weapon"

"what do you mean?" spike asked her.

"you know, metal, sharp, pointy" Buffy said,

"no I mean why are you going after him" spike said to her, "I don't want you to get hurt".

"oh come on spike. I'm the Slayer; I'm going to slay him. I've decided I'm not going to wait around here like in the movies for Carlos to find me"

Buffy and spike walked to angels office.


	18. Chapter 18

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. _

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

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_Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've been on holiday._

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Chapter 18 – the fight  **(I know lame title)**

Angel was sitting at his desk doing some paper work when spike and Buffy walked into his office. "Hi" he said to them.

Buffy didn't reply, she walked to the wall behind angel's desk where some of angels weapons were on shelves. Which is dangerous in a place like wolfram and hart, when it's being attacked every week, but it looked good.

Buffy glanced at the weapons and pulled off a long sword. She held it in her hands. It had a long shiny metal blade and a black handle. It looked sharp enough to do some damage to Carlo.

Angel looked at Buffy, "what's going on?" he asked her.

"I'm going to do some slaying" Buffy said strongly. She walked into the center of the room and swung the sword around a little.

Spike stepped back a little. "Blimey, watch out pet, unless you want to take my eye out" he said.

"Oh please do" angel said quietly.

Spike heard this but didn't reply to angel.

"Right ok" Buffy said quietly. She was calming herself down so she could do this. 'Can I do this?' she asked herself. 'Yes of course I can. He's a …. Demon or something.'

"What is going on?" angel asked.

Spike looked at angel. "Carlo is back and trying to kill us" he said simply – making it sound like it was nothing.

"What? I thought he was dead" angel said.

"He was" Buffy said. "But not anymore, maybe he wasn't really dead in the first place."

"I don't think this is a good idea, maybe I could get a team on it." Angel said. "Where is he?"

"He's here. He pulled the plug on the elevators so we had to climb out. He's not giving up" Buffy said to angel. "So I gotta end it"

Buffy walked towards the door to leave, she was going to look for Carlo.

"I'm coming with you luv" spike said as he followed her out of the office.

Angel was left sitting alone in his office. He picked up the phone, "harmony I need security to sweep the building for any non authorised beings." He said.

"Ok bossy" harmony said as she hung up the phone.

………………………………………………………………………….

As Buffy walked into the lobby she saw Carlo, blood was still running down his once handsome face. He started walking towards her.

Buffy brought the sword up ready.

Spike stood a few paces back from her. Even though he didn't want her fighting him alone, but he knew that this was her fight. She needed to end it herself.

As Carlo got closer Buffy began to panic. She took a couple of deep breathes.

But Carlo didn't go for Buffy, he walked past her and grabbed spike by the throat.

"Spike!" Buffy shouted as Carlo lifted him off the ground.

Angel walked outside his office to see spike and Carlo. As much as he enjoyed watching spike being hurt, he decided he would step in. he went over to Carlo and kicked him in the back.

Spike was dropped to the ground.

When Buffy noticed he was ok, he didn't need to breathe; she went over to Carlo who was now fighting angel.

Buffy walked over to Carlo, she held the sword tightly. It was hard to get an aim on him as he kept turning around as he kicked and punched Angel.

Spike just laughed as he saw angel being punched in the face over and over again.

When Carlo was standing in front of Buffy with his back to her, Buffy decided this would be her chance. She drove the sword right into his back.

Carlo fell to his knees.

Angel stepped back; his nose was bleeding from the fight.

Spike went over to Buffy as Carlo finally fell to the ground.

She kicked him in the side and he rolled over onto his back. The sword had gone right through him, he was dead.

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	19. Chapter 19

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 19 – Alone

She sat alone on the steps of wolfram and hart. The sky was a dark blanket covered in gleaming stars that shone down over the city. There was a cold breeze that made her shiver as she looked out at the busy street in front of her.

Everyone was going out to the clubs and parties that were all around the city every night. These people wanted to make there lives a little less miserable, so they go out, get drunk and get laid. That was the circle in which people around this city followed everyday.

Buffy wrapped her arms around herself to block out the cold. It had been two days since the wolfram and hart security team took Carlo's lifeless body away. She had been told that they had checked to see if he was completely dead, and he was. She knew she didn't have to worry about him coming back anymore.

Wesley had come to the conclusion that when she had pushed him down the stairs, that he was just knocked out and when she had checked his pulse, because he was some type of demon, he didn't have a pulse.

Buffy wondered how she hadn't noticed that her husband didn't have a pulse. She was usually so careful. Well, no she wasn't. Angel and spike didn't have pulses, but that was beside the point.

'I would have noticed it I'm sure', she thought to herself as she looked at all the expensive cars that were in the large traffic jam outside wolfram and hart. 'Maybe I was so distracted actually being happy that I'd found some one that I didn't really check. Maybe being with spike before, it made me forget all about it. Ok that sounds stupid she thought.

The fact of the matter was that she hadn't even worked why Carlo had been with her or if he really loved her. That was possible, when spike didn't have a soul, he still loved her.

She didn't know what type of demon Carlo had been and she didn't know what his plan was. But it didn't matter anymore, he was gone. And that was all that mattered at the moment.

Buffy got up from the steps and looked down at her watch. She'd been sitting out here for two hours. Buffy felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned around to see spike looking back at her.

"Hi pet" he said coolly.

"Hey" Buffy said simply. She wasn't in the mood to talk; she just wanted to move on.

"I've been looking for ya luv. Thought you might of …." He didn't finish his sentence. He looked at her, she looked tired. "You look tired" he said.

"Thanks very much" Buffy snapped. She didn't mean it to sound like she was pissed off with him. He was right, she did feel tired. She hadn't been sleeping well; too many thoughts.

"Sorry luv. I didn't mean it like that" Spike apologised.

"No it's me, sorry" she said. She walked up to the top of the steps. Spike followed her as usual. "I am tired; I think I'm going to go to bed."

Buffy walked off into wolfram and hart, she went over to the elevator. Spike was still following her.

She turned to face him as she waited for the elevator. "That is something that doesn't involve you" she said to him.

Spike looked slightly disappointed. "We need to talk you know" he said.

"We are talking" Buffy said to him. She glanced over the top of the elevator doors to see which floor it was on. It was only two floors away.

"No, properly" he said, he touched her hair.

The elevator doors opened.

Buffy walked into the elevator. She pressed the buttons to close the door.

"Not tonight" she said as the doors closed on him.

Buffy leaned against the elevator wall. She hoped she would be able to get some sleep tonight. She felt so drained.

The elevator doors opened on the correct floor and she walked down the corridor and opened her apartment door. She stepped in and locked the door behind her. She wanted to be alone. Spike never seemed to give up on anything and she knew he didn't like the way she left him. But she didn't want to go into a conversation with him. She knew him wanted to talk about 'them'. That was a much too confusing conversation than she could handle right now.

She walked into the bedroom and got changed. She liked her new bedroom; angel had good taste in furniture. The light blue walls perfectly matched the blue bed sheets. The only problem about the room was that the blue made it feel a little cold, or was that just her. It didn't matter anyway, this wouldn't e her permanent home, and she knew she would have to move to her own place eventually. She would have to sell the house that her and Carlo lived in. hopefully she would get enough money from that to buy a nice place for herself.

All these thoughts filled her head but she just wanted to get good nights sleep. She yawned slipped into bed and immediately fell into a deep sleep.

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_Please review, I want to know you guys are still interested in the story. You guys are the reason I write and I really appreciate reviews !_

_Next chapter coming soon_


	20. Chapter 20

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

_(( Thanks to Holly and Maria for getting rid of my writers block. Trampolines help a lot lol ))_

chapter 20 – Something's Wrong

Buffy woke up next morning to the bright sun light that came through a crack in the curtains. She had a sinking feeling in her stomach that told her something was wrong. Nothing apocalyptic, nothing that would end the world, but something about her self wasn't right. She sat up in bed then looked at the clock, it was 2pm. "I can't believe I slept that long" Buffy said, even though no one was in the room to hear her. Suddenly she ran into the bathroom and threw up in the toilet. She sat down on the cold marble floor. 'I must have eaten something' she told herself.

After about half an hour of sitting on the cold bathroom floor, Buffy decided to take a long shower. After this she felt much better. She pulled on a long black skirt and a purple strappy top than sat at the dressing table. She brushed her long hair slowly; she looked at herself in the mirror. She missed her friends and her family. Dawn was still in Rome, she was staying with her friends. Dawn had become quite attached to them. Dawn had found it difficult making friends at first but then she turned popular over night. Buffy had no idea what caused this but she was just happy that dawn had made friends. But as long as dawn was happy and doing well in school, nothing else mattered.

Buffy hadn't made a lot of friends in Rome. It wasn't that she didn't want to make new friends, she just felt like she would be betraying Willow and Xander if she had a new group. So she had stayed by her self, which dawn hadn't seemed to notice.

After applying some make up Buffy walked out of her apartment and walked down the corridor. She stopped suddenly half way down the corridor. "Oh god" she said. Buffy realised that she had skipped a period. "That can't be right".

Buffy continued walking down the corridor deep in thought when she bumped into someone. "Oh sorry" she said, then she looked up and saw spike.

"Hey luv just came to check if you were ok" he said.

Buffy's eyes widened, the only person she had slept with in the last few weeks was spike. But it wasn't possible; she knew vampires couldn't have children. But there was that thing were angel got Darla pregnant; but that was different.

"You ok pet?" spike asked, he looked at Buffy worried expression.

"emmmm no" Buffy said. Then she realised what she said. Buffy didn't want to let spike no there was anything wrong. "I mean yeah, I'm fine. I'm just …. Going" Buffy walked over to the lift and walked in.

Spike turned around confused. Buffy was acting like herself. Some thing must have happened. He slipped through the elevator doors just as they were closing.

Buffy sighed , "spike cant you just go ?" she said.

"Well no luv. I wanna know why you're avoiding me" spike said to her as he leaned against the elevator wall.

"I'm not avoiding you" Buffy said lying. "I'm just busy"

"Buffy" spike said.

Buffy turned her head to look at him. Those piercing blue eyes seemed to look right into her. She didn't know what to say to him.

The elevator doors opened.

Buffy quickly walked out of the elevator and out of the main doors into the sunlight.

Spike stopped and watched her through the glass as she walked down the steps and ran down the street.

'I have to know' Buffy thought to herself as she ran. ' I have to know for sure. But I can't be can I ? I doesn't make any sense. No I can't be, it's just me thinking of things that will never ever happen to me. But I don't want this, I can't handle a child. Ok I am thinking about this all wrong. I am not pregnant, but I better check to make sure.'

Buffy walked into the pharmacy and bought herself a home pregnancy test. She walked back to wolfram and hart slowly. She was thinking about all the different possibilities of what could happen once she does this test.

Buffy went quickly up to her apartment, avoiding spike as he walked out of angel's office. She heard them shouting at each other as soon as she walked in the building. She walked through her door and locked it behind her. She placed the pregnancy test down on the coffee table and sat on the sofa. She stared at the box not knowing what to do, did she really want to know?

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_I know this chapter is a bit strained, but I was unsure what to write. Sorry if you're disappointed._


	21. Chapter 21

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

_(( Sorry it took so long to write this one, I hope you like it ! ))_

Chapter 21 – why me?

She was sitting on the cold bathroom floor. He head in her hands and her tucked up to her chest. Her once neat pony tail had now fallen and her hair was hanging down by her face, sticking to her face because of the tears. She could hear the faint buzzing of the air conditioning.

Buffy lifted her head a little; she looked at the pregnancy test that she had thrown across the bathroom floor. She picked it up and looked at it once more to make sure she didn't miss read it. She didn't; the test was positive.

Buffy broke down again. This couldn't be happening, it just couldn't. There was no possible explanation to what was happening to her. Buffy stood up slowly; her legs were shaking so much causing her to wobble. Buffy took another deep breath in. She went over to the sink and washed her face with cool water and patted it fry with a fluffy towel that was hanging from the towel rail.

She looked at herself in the mirror. "I look terrible" she said. Buffy washed her hands with some soap then walked out of the bathroom.

The sun was now down, 'how long was I in there?' she asked herself.

Buffy sat down on the sofa. She rested her head on the cushions. Her eyes were burning because of the tears; a few stray tears fell from the corners of her eyes.

'How? Why?' Buffy thought to herself. 'This cant be happening. I don't understand. How am I meant to deal with this? Oh my god, what happens when spike finds out? What happens when angel finds out? Oh no spike is gonna be so pissed. I can't believe it. Or maybe he will be happy? I dunno. It's difficult to tell with spike. He's complicated, we are complicated.'

Buffy had been so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she hadn't heard the knock at the door. The caller was not giving up. They had been knocking for about 10 minutes.

Buffy got up off the sofa and went to the door. She looked through the peep hole and saw it was spike.

'Oh no no no no no no!' Buffy thought she stepped away from the door quietly.

"I can hear you pet" spike said through the door. "You know with the vampire hearing and what ever".

Buffy stopped then hesitated, if she let him in, he would know there was something wrong. She had to get rid of him now.

"I'm ill" Buffy said giving a fake cough. "So you can't come in, it might be contagious". She heard spike chuckle through the door.

"Vampire luv, you're safe with me. So let me in" he said softly.

'Oh I am so stupid' Buffy thought to herself.

"Your not going to give up are you?" she asked.

"Never pet. You know that" spike said with a grin.

Buffy could see him smirking, not physically, but she could see him in her head, that cheeky grin he gave her regularly.

Buffy sighed and went to open the door. She saw him standing there with his trade mark leather jacket on as usual. She, on the other hand was still wearing the black skirt and purple top from yesterday. 'Or was it today?' Buffy thought as she looked down at herself. The days were all blending together.

"There you are slayer, was starting to get worried about you" spike said. "Can I come in?"

"Emm no" Buffy said, giving another fake cough.

Spike smiled and stepped in anyway.

"Hey! I didn't invite you in" Buffy said surprised that spike just walked in. She didn't know why she was surprised because it was spike, that's what he did.

"I've been in before luv" spike said as he closed the door.

Buffy stepped back. "I don't want to see you right now" she said. She turned and walked into the living room. Of course spike followed her.

"Well, luv, you've been avoiding me for too long" spike said.

Buffy couldn't look at him straight in the eye anymore. 'I can't tell him, I don't want to see his reaction' she thought.

Buffy sat back down on the sofa.

"You've been crying luv" spike said.

Buffy kept her eyes down on the carpet.

"Why?" spike continued.

"Don't spike!" Buffy snapped and stood up. "This isn't anything to do with you. You're not in my life anymore". She didn't know why she suddenly snapped but she just didn't want spike to know.

"That's what you say love. I've heard this tune so many times. Stop lying to yourself, I know you don't mean it." Spike said coolly.

Buffy walked off to the bathroom, it's the only place she could think of that spike couldn't get in. Well he could but there was no bed to tempt him. She knew he would get ideas then charm her into getting into bed.

Buffy tried to close the door but spike pushed against it and it opened.

"Spike go away please" Buffy pleaded.  
"No luv I want you to talk to me" spike said.

Buffy shuck her head and didn't say anything.

Spike looked down as well and noticed something on the floor. He picked it up and looked back up at Buffy, his eyes widened.

Buffy looked up and realised what spike was holding. The word 'Crap' went through her brain.


	22. Chapter 22

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 22 – Yours 

"No spike, its not what it looks like" Buffy said urgently.

"Bloody hell luv, it is what I think it is" spike said.

"No" Buffy said

Spike interrupted her, "how, who..." he said. He didn't understand this. He hadn't realised that she was seeing someone else.

"Is this why you've been avoiding me? You've been seeing someone else." Spike asked.

"No there hasn't been anyone else!" Buffy said, she was starting to panic.

"Come on Buffy, don't lie to me. You must have seeing someone else. A baby just doesn't appear one day! How could you do this, fucks sake you know how much I love you. No other guy could love you as much as me" spike looked at her; he couldn't believe this was happening. The woman he loved was pregnant with another mans child.

When spike said there was no other man that could love her as much as him, it made her have butterflies in her stomach "Listen to me spike, there is no other guy. There never was another guy." Buffy said.

"So wait a second pet, you saying this baby is …."Spike trailed off.

"Yours" Buffy finished his sentence.

Spike was confused. He knew this wasn't possible. 'How could this happen? It can't, its impossible. Well it happened for angel, but that was different.' He thought, so many different thoughts were going through his head he didn't know whethere he could speak.

"I don't understand this luv" he said to her finally.

Buffy leaned against the bathroom wall. "And you think I do? God spike this doesn't make sense. But it's true and there's nothing I can do about it"

"So you're not happy?" spike asked.

Buffy sighed. "I really don't know" she said. "It feels like a weird dream."

"If it means anything, I'm happy pet" spike said.  
"You are?" Buffy asked. She was surprised that he was happy; she didn't know how he would react.

"Well yeah! I never thought I could have kids. So this is kinda a once in a life time thing." Spike said.

Buffy stood up straight. She felt bad; she didn't even know whether she was going to keep the baby.

'How will I cope with a kid?' she thought to herself. 'I'm a slayer, how am I meant to do my job and have a baby'. Buffy just couldn't see how this was going to work. Her and spike weren't together anymore, she didn't want her baby split between two parents. She knew what that was like and she told herself, if she ever had children, she would never do that to them.

"Slayer, what's the matter?" spike asked. He reached out and took her hand and held it in his own.

"I can't see myself with a baby. I'm not sure if I can have one. I'm a slayer, I wont be able to cope. And I cant see you running round after a baby." Buffy said. She walked out of the bathroom and went to the living room.

The living room was dark. There was a full moon that could be seen hanging over the many sky scrapers of LA. It looked picture perfect but Buffy paid no attention to its beauty.

It would be nice just to sit down and look at the view from her large windows.

Buffy sighed and stood in the middle of the living room.

"Pet, there are thousands of slayers now. Remember the spell that Red did. There isn't just you now." Spike said, as he followed her to the living room.

He put the little piece of plastic down on the table.

She turned around to face him. "I know but everyone is counting on me. Giles wants me to go to England soon and help out with the new watchers council; he called me a few days ago" Buffy told him.

Spike looked upset. "And you only just thought of telling me this now? That's why you've been avoiding me"

"Spike this has nothing to do with you. This is my life and my decision whether I go any where. Its up to me, you can't control every move I make. I don't belong to you."

Buffy looked down for a moment. She hadn't really given it much thought whether she was going or not. She had put it to the back of her mind and was trying to forget about it for the moment. Then this came up and then she had more important things to think about.

"To be honest spike I hadn't really thought about it. Giles just said…." Buffy started to explain before spike interrupted her.

"Screw Giles. I don't really care what he has to say. Buffy, I care about you. I haven't been with you five minutes and now you want to go off to the mother country." Spike was shouting.

"Spike please just … be quiet. Don't you think I've had enough today!" Buffy said. "Just go", she put her head in her hands.

"No" spike said stubbornly.

"Yes" Buffy snapped, she pushed him on the shoulders gently. She really didn't want to get into a fight right now.

Spike let out an un-needed breath of frustration and turned around to walk out the apartment. As he reached the door, he turned his head. "I'm not going to drop this slayer. Not while your carrying my baby." He opened the front door and left.

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_Sorry you've had to wait so long for this chapter, I was thinking about how I was going to play it. I think it turned out ok. I hope you guys are still interested in the story ive added a few twists I hope you like. Please give me feedback. Thanks, Hope xxxx_

_p.s chapter coming soon !_


	23. Chapter 23

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse._

Chapter 23 – time to tell

Buffy hadn't left the apartment in days. She couldn't bare it if she ran into spike and he started asking questions. So she had decided to stay inside and just hope that it would all go away, even though she knew deep down things wouldn't change.

Buffy had been lying in bed staring at the ceiling for the past hour. She had been thinking about the baby; that's all she thought about at the moment. She decided to pull herself out of bed as she was starting to get hungry.

Buffy pulled on her dressing gown and walked slowly out of the bedroom. She walked into her small kitchen, she missed her big kitchen at her old house; the one where she lived with Carlo. That house was what every little girl dreamed about.

But she missed the house in Sunnydale more. It felt really ….. She didn't know, it just felt like home. That house was perfect, and was now at the bottom of a crater.

Buffy opened the fridge to find it empty.

"Ok, this is the problem when you don't leave the flat" she said. She reluctantly closed the fridge and opened the cupboards to find them all empty as well.

"I guess I better go do a bit of shopping" she said with a sigh.

Buffy was lucky. She had a joint account with Carlo and he had lots of money, so she decided to live off him for a bit. At first, she thought that was a bit weird; taking her ex husbands money. But it was kinda weird that he wasn't human so she thought of it as compensation.

Buffy put a hand on her stomach. She had a little bump, some one who didn't know she was pregnant wouldn't have noticed, but that didn't matter. It was starting.

Buffy went to have a shower and then got changed into a pair of black jeans and red top. She had retrieved all her clothes from her house with the help of angel and spike. It seemed they couldn't get her stuff out of that house any quicker. Buffy didn't care about this, she just wanted to get out of the house and forget about it.

It had sold quickly enough, a perfect house like that wouldn't stay on the market for long. She got a good price, so this added to her funds.

After Buffy applied her make up she was ready to face the world; she kept telling herself this as she left the apartment.

'Maybe I should stop in to see angel. I kind of owe him for letting me live here' she thought as the elevator door opened and she walked out towards Angels' office.

Buffy pushed open the doors and saw angel sitting at his desk. Spike was standing looking out at sunny LA. Buffy never got used to seeing the two vampires in the light.

"Buffy" angel said as he looked up from his book.

Spike turned around, he hadn't noticed Buffy come in. "hi pet" he said.

Buffy smiled a little. "Just thought I'd drop by and say hi" she said. "So hi" she added then turned around ready to walk out the door.

"No wait Buffy" angel said. "I haven't seen you in ages, why don't you stay and chat for a while".

Buffy turned on her heels. "Emm I dunno, I have to go shopping for food and stuff" she said sounding hesitant.

Spike had been watching her closely she had noticed.

"I can get some one to go food shopping for you. It's ok" angel said as he picked up his phone.

"No angel it's…" but he was already asking harmony to get someone to get food for her apartment.

Angel hung the phone up. "Done" he said, "now you can talk to me... I mean us".

Buffy smiled weakly and walked over to a leather arm chair then sat down. She glanced from Spike to Angel.

"You feeling ok luv? Haven't seen you in a few days" spike said to her as he sat on the arm of another chair.

"I'm good" Buffy said.

Spike raised an eye brow, "you sure?"

"Yes spike I'm fine" she said irritably.

Angel looked at spike. He had never understood what she saw in him and was glad that they were no longer together.

Buffy wondered whether angel knew she was pregnant. Maybe spike told him to rub it in or something.

'If he's told angel, I'm gonna kill him' she thought to herself.

Angel stood up, "I'm going to go get some blood" he said.

"Why don't you just ask harmony to get some?" she asked curiously.

"She's busy doing work. Well she's probably painting her nails again but it's less hassle if I get it myself. I'll be back in a minute" he said as he walked out the office.

As soon as angel left, Buffy got up out of the arm chair.

"Have you told him?" she asked Spike.

"Told who what?" spike asked innocently.

"Don't play dumb with me spike. Did you tell angel that I'm…" Buffy said.

"That you're carrying my baby, no I haven't told him. Bloody well tempted though. Just to see the look on peaches face when he finds out there's no way of getting back with you, that moment would be priceless." Spike told her as he stood up as well.

"Spike, stop saying what I can and can't do. I can date who ever I want to date. And just because I am carrying your baby doesn't mean that I can date other people." She explained.

Spikes eyes dropped to the floor.

"Spike, I'm not getting back with angel, you know that" Buffy said.

Spike grinned, "Yeah cos if you were, I might have to hurt him. He doesn't deserve you" he said.

Buffy smiled.

Spike walked over to her, "besides you know we're good together slayer".

Buffy stepped back a little. "I think I need to tell angel I'm pregnant."

"And I'm going to be there when that happens. Its gonna be hilarious" spike smiled.

"No your not, I need to tell him with out you here. I don't know how he's going to react" she said.

"So I need to be here to protect you" spike told her.

"Angel won't hurt me spike and you know that" Buffy told him. To be honest she didn't know how angel would react. It didn't really matter, but she thought he deserved to know.

Angel re entered the office carrying a mug of blood.

Buffy gave spike a 'get out now' look.

Spike was going to protest but saw there was no point, he walked out the office and closed the doors behind him. Of course he would be listening from outside the door.

"Whats wrong with captain peroxide?" angel asked as he sat back down.

"Nothing" she said, she wanted to get straight to the point. "Angel I have something to tell you."


	24. Chapter 24

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

Chapter 24 – Now he knows

"Angel I have something to tell you."

"What's the matter?" angel asked her. "Are you ok?" his voice had a hint of worry.

"I think you better sit down" Buffy said pointing at the sofa.

Angel walked over to the sofa and sat down.

Buffy stood on the spot for a moment then walked over to the sofa and sat down next to him. She had no idea how she was going to tell him. Angel was her first love, at one point in her life he was the only person she saw in her future. Now she had to think about a baby. She had no idea how he would react. She was lucky that spike was happy about it, but angel …. Angel hated spike enough and wanted to stake him on a normal day, never mind him finding out that spike had got Buffy pregnant.

"Buffy you're scaring me" angel said, "Whats happened"

"I have something… important you need to know" she said, trying to choose her words carefully.

"Ok" angel said, "I'm listening."

"Ok" Buffy said as she took a deep breath. "You have to promise me that you're not going to get angry."

"Of course, I can't be angry with you." Angel replied calmly.

"Not just me. Just stay calm ok?" Buffy said. She really didn't think angel would be 'ok' with this news. She could just see it; angel shouting at her and doing god knows what to spike.

"Yes ok, just tell me!" angel said.

"Ok" Buffy said, she knew she had to do it. "I'm pregnant".

Angel didn't move, he just looked at her with questioning eyes.

"Angel did you hear me?" she asked.

Angel stood up from the sofa. "Whose is it?" he asked.

"Its Emm Spikes" she said quietly looking down at the ground.

"What!" angel shouted. This made Buffy look back up again.

"You said you wouldn't get angry" Buffy said, Buffy stood up.

"Well, I thought you were going to tell me that you broke a vase or something. Not that you were pregnant with spikes child! How did this happen? I didn't think you two were together anymore. I thought you had more sense than that. I thought you'd have learned your lesson!" angel said looking at her in shock.

"I thought you should know that's all" Buffy said.

"That's all? Buffy, you can't have spikes child!" he told her.

Spike opened the office door, from which he had been listening to their entire conversation from the other side. "And why the hell not!" spike asked.

"Because spike your not good enough for her and I've told you this before. Its just your head is too thick for you to get the message. You cant have a child your too incompetent and its impossible."

"oh so its impossible for me and not you. Well peaches, this aint any of your business. So I guess you can keep your big forehead out" spike said with a smirk.

"Spike" Buffy said disapprovingly.

"What? Luv he can't just go around thinking he is better than me." Spike said.

"I am" angel said.

"Is that right?" spike smirked. "You're the one who can't decide whether he's good or evil. That pesky soul just keeps getting lost doesn't it." Spike said.

Angel walked towards spike. "That isn't the issue. Buffy is too good for you and you don't deserve her."

"Wait who said I was getting back with anyone?" Buffy interrupted. "Why does everyone think that?"

"And you think you deserve her?" spike asked him as he stepped towards angel, looking to start a fight.

Buffy grabbed spike and pulled him away from spike. "Stop it!" she shouted.

"He bloody well started it luv" spike told her.

"Actually you started this" angel said looking at spike angrily. "You got her pregnant."

"Hello" spike said, "It takes two!"

"Stop it!" Buffy shouted again. "You two act like kids I can't take it. Just stop!"

Spike sighed. "Ok" he said, still glaring at angel out of the corner of his eye.

Angel looked at Buffy but didn't say anything.

"Spike could you leave us alone for a bit … again. And this time don't listen from the door" Buffy told him.

Spike turned to angel, he was about to say something but decided not to. He walked out the office. Maybe he could talk to harmony for a bit. Well no one could get a proper conversation out of harmony, but it was funny to try. The things that harmony said were just so stupid that you had to laugh.

Buffy looked at angel. "I can't expect you to be happy. I know that, but I can't get rid of it. I don't even know how this happened. It isn't meant to. So I need your help to figure out why." She said.

"I agree that this shouldn't have happened, in more ways than one. But ok, I'll help. I'll get Wesley to look up any prophecies or something. I don't really know where to start."

"At the beginning" Buffy said.

Angel smiled. "It's not that simple"

"I know, just thought I'd like to see you smile sometime today" Buffy said with a little smile.

"Ok" angel said. "I better go have a talk with Wesley. Emm do you want me to tell him it's yours and spike?"

"I think that might be best, then he can look for something specific… I mean it must be, cos a slayer and a vampire. That doesn't happen very often. Well unless you're me" she said. And I guess I'll start showing soon anyway."

"Yeah" angel said. "I'll see you later" angel walked out.

Buffy sat down on the sofa to think.

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_more coming soon _


	25. Chapter 25

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

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**Chapter 25 – He felt it kick ** _( ok I know lame title but I couldn't think of anything lol )_

A few weeks had past and this baby had been growing quicker than Buffy expected. She looked like she'd been pregnant for at least five months but it had only been four weeks.

'it must be something to do with spike being a vampire' Buffy thought to herself as she sat on the sofa eating a box of chocolates that Fred had given her yesterday, as a 'your having a vampires child and it might be evil' gift.

But no one knew any more about the baby. Wesley and his department had been researching thoroughly since the day angel told them. Wesley had been very curious about this mystical pregnancy. Fred had filled her in on how Wesley stole Connor and gave him to angel's enemy. But Fred told her that Wesley had his reasons and it all came down to a prophecy.

The great thing about pregnancy in Buffy's opinion was she could eat what she wanted and it didn't matter if she put on weight. Buffy rested her head on a soft pillow and flicked the channel on the tv. Daytime tv wasn't the greatest invention in the world, but she dealt with it on a daily basis.

Spike insisted that she wouldn't have to lift a finger. He didn't want her, or the baby, to get hurt. So Buffy hadn't been patrolling in weeks.

"This is driving me mad" she said as she turned off the tv. She put the box of chocolates down on the coffee table and stood up slowly. She pulled down the blue and white maternity top which had fills and bows on it. Buffy hated maternity clothes, it made her feel like an oversized doily.

Everyone that Buffy had met around wolfram hart on her regular walk around wolfram and harts many levels which seemed the number of floors was never ending. It was the only exercise she got, Spike had been watching her every move just to make sure she wasn't over doing it.

Buffy thought this was kind of sweet but she didn't really like the fact that everyone was treating her like she needed to be wrapped up in cotton wool to make sure she didn't smash into a million tiny pieces.

Buffy pulled on a long black cardigan and tied the belt loosely around her large stomach. She slipped on her shoes and walked out of the apartment. She walked down the corridor and decided to take the stairs.

When she reached half way down the first flight of stairs she noticed a brown haired woman picking up paper she'd dropped on the floor.

"You need to some help?" Buffy asked as she reached down slowly to pick up a piece of paper.

Fred turned her head and looked up at Buffy. She pushed her glasses up that were falling off her nose and gave a warm smile.

"Oh Buffy hey" she said warmly. "No its ok I got it". Fred collected all the paper off the floor and put them into one of the many folders that were in her arms.

Buffy handed Fred the random piece of paper that she picked up and Fred placed it in the folder.

"You got lots of work?" Buffy asked Fred.

"Emm yeah I guess" Fred replied. "Everyone at the moment is talking about you and this little bundle of joy". Fred placed a hand on Buffy's bump. "Growing quickly" she smiled.

"Yeah I know" Buffy said. Buffy had realised that when she became pregnant her mid section had become public property and so she had to get used to the fact that everyone wanted to touch it.

"Or bundle of hell, depends on how you look at it. Has Wesley found out anything?" Buffy asked curiously. The more she found out about the baby, the better she would feel.

"Not that I know of. Wes has been looking through loads of different scriptures and prophecies but there isn't anything definite about your baby. But I'm sure it will be fine" Fred said with a smile. "Now I better get back to the lab, I have lots of formulas to work out" Fred started to walk up the stairs. "Oh and have a nice walk. Maybe if you try a different rout, spike won't stalk you for maybe …. Five minutes. At least you'll get a head start." she turned and walked up and out onto one of the many corridors.

Buffy smiled. She and Fred had been talking more often. Buffy missed Willow, she still spoke to her best friend on the phone but it wasn't the same. Buffy liked having another woman to talk to. Well it was either Fred or Harmony so Buffy thought she would make the sane choice.

Willow and Kennedy were getting along great. Willow was helping Giles set up the new watchers council and Kennedy was one of the lead slayers who helped train the younger ones. Kennedy seemed to like taking charge, which at one point put Buffy in a difficult position. But if she was helping out Buffy could deal with it. And it wasn't as if Buffy could help with the demon fighting at the moment.

So Buffy continued to walk down the steps and walked out onto a random corridor, she didn't really know her way around the place so she thought it would be fun to get lost once in a while. Make things a bit more exciting for her self.

She walked down this random corridor then suddenly felt a kick from the baby. It hadn't kicked like this before. She held a hand to her stomach and leaned against the wall.

The kicking soon passed. "Some one takes after daddy don't ya" she said with a little smile.

Buffy took in a few deep breaths then saw spike walking towards her wearing his usual long black duster.

As h reached her she said, "Don't you ever get hot in that?"

Spike grinned, "when I'm around you luv" he said.

Buffy laughed and shook her head a little.

"Did it kick?" spike asked her.

Buffy nodded. She only just realised spike had never felt the baby kick. She always kept it to herself; she had enough people touching her stomach as it was, never mind when the baby was moving.

"Can I?" spike asked.

"Sure" Buffy said. She reached out for his hand and placed it on her stomach.

They waited in silence until she felt the baby kick again.

Spike grinned, "gonna be a football player isn't he" he said.

"What do you mean he. It could be a girl." She said with a smile.

"Well, only a boy could kick like that" he said with a smile. He liked their little play fights, it's the only way he could get close to her. Not physically close, but it was when he saw he let her walls down; when she forgot about everything else and was just being herself.

"Ha" Buffy said with a grin. "That's a lie, what am I?"

"You're different pet" he said as he took his hand off her stomach.

"Yeah and so is this baby, and I think its going to be a girl" Buffy said as she stood up straight.

"Wanna make a little bet on that?" spike smirked.

"Maybe I do" Buffy added.

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_Sorry for the delay but here it is. Be happy _


	26. Chapter 26

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

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Chapter 26

The office was more or less the same as angels only smaller. Paintings hung on the wall and books were crammed onto shelves they looked like they would soon tumble off. Wesley's desk wasn't much different, books one on top of the other. Buffy sat nervously in a chair in front of Wesley's desk. Wesley was sat on the other side of the desk; he looked at her and shuffled some paper around on the desk.

"So what's this about?" Buffy asked him, she hand a hand on her stomach.

"Well, as you know I've been looking for any type of prophecy that might be linked to your baby" he said to her.

"Yeah I know. And you haven't come up with anything" Buffy said.

"That's not true" he told her, "I have come across a few passages that talk about a child but they don't say much".

"Well any info will be good right now. Have you seen me, I'm 3 months pregnant and I already look like a balloon"

"I think that's just because of spike being a vampire, I can't be sure though this hasn't really happened before" Wesley said, he wasn't sure whether Buffy knew about Connor so he decided to leave that part out.

Buffy nodded. "Did you ever think that my baby isn't linked to a prophecy, its just…. a baby"

"I can't be sure of anything Buffy, you have a unique case" Wesley said.

"Well ok I know that, but why did you call me in here?" Buffy asked.

"Angel is worried about you" Wesley said.

Buffy sighed, 'what is his problem! I just wish angel would stay out of my business, he doesn't own me or anything!' Buffy thought to herself.

"Why is he worried about me?" Buffy asked

"He's been speaking to spike" Wesley said.

"Wow angel's been speaking to spike not shouting insults, that's a first" Buffy said sarcastically.

"Well yes" Wesley said, he didn't seem to find it funny. "Anyway he told me spike thinks you two are getting closer again and spike gave the impression that you two were getting back together."

"Me and spike?" Buffy questioned.

"Yes and angel, as he has told you many times, doesn't want you to be with spike" Wesley said.

Buffy stood, "why doesn't angel tell me himself, not that I would listen. Why does he always butt into my business? This has nothing to do with him."

"I know" Wesley said.

"No Wes you don't. I don't know who angel thinks he is but he has to give me some space, he doesn't own me, I can do what I want." Buffy said.

"He just told me to talk to you, thats all." Wesley said.

"Well thanks, but can you tell angel, if he wants to lecture me he can do it himself. Actually no, I will go talk to him myself" Buffy walked out of the office and down the corridor to angels office. She knocked on the door.

Tbc …..

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_I know it's a really short chapter soz. I know it isn't the best chapter in the world but I think of it as a bridge builder._

_Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I have been snowed under with school work , but luckily I found a shovel and I dug myself out, so yay I have time to write now. _

_More coming soon !_


	27. Chapter 27

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

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Chapter 27 – jealous vampire crap

Buffy didn't wait for a reply she just walked in to the office. As usual angel was sitting at his desk, paper work piled high.

Angel looked up from his desk; he knew where she had just come from. Wesley had called through to his office only moments ago to warn him Buffy was on the war path and was heading his way.

"Hi" he said, Angel couldn't really think of what to say.

"Oh hi" she said sarcastically, "is that all you have to say" Buffy began to pace. "Where the hell do you get off telling me what I can do with my life. Angel you have to get this into your head that I don't belong to you! We haven't been together in along time, but you still feel the need to protect me!"

"But" angel started.

Buffy held up a hand, she wasn't finished. She started to pace around the office. "Angel I don't need protecting, I'm not 17 anymore! I am perfectly capable f looking after myself. And another thing, my relationships are none of your business!" she stopped to look at him.

"Well they are if their with spike!" Angel said.

"For god's sake angel! What is it with you and him? What you're like 200 plus years old cant you just grow up and move on. And I know what you're going to say, 'oh he's not good enough for you' " Buffy said impersonating Angel.

Angel stood up, "so are you saying that I can't care about you, 'cause I will never stop caring about you." He told her.

"No, I'm telling you to be happy for me and stop trying to control everything" Buffy said, she rested her hand on her even bigger stomach.

"Yeah peaches" spike said as he strolled leisurely into the office, he gave Buffy a grin.

Buffy turned to spike, "Don't grin at me like that you aren't any better!" she said.

Spike held is hands up, "hey luv, didn't do anything here" he told her.

"I don't want any more crap from either of you. Spike, you told angel that you and me were getting back together. We are not!"

Angel laughed a little

Buffy spun around to look at him, "shut your mouth right now before I shut it for you" she said angrily.

Spike moved towards the desk.

Buffy looked at both of them, "I can't take any of this jealous vampire crap any more ok" she said. Buffy felt a sharp pain in her stomach; she put a hand on her stomach.

"Oh my god" Buffy said, she winced in pain.

"Buffy what is it luv?" Spike asked nervously.

"My water just broke" Buffy said, she suddenly collapsed to the floor.

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hope you like , next chap coming soon


	28. Chapter 28

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

A new arrival

Spike and Angel ran over to Buffy and knelt down next to her. Spike put his hand on her face.

"Buffy" he said.

There was no response, Buffy was still.

Suddenly the office doors swung open and in walked harmony, "angel your three o'clock is here" her eyes drifted to Buffy lying on the floor. "Hey what's up with her?" she asked

Spike looked up at Harmony, "Harm get a doctor" he said.

"Hey don't speak to me like that! Remember I've told you before, I'm not your girlfriend any more you can't treat me like this!" she said.

"Harmony!" Angel said looking up.

Harmony held hands up, "sorry" she said sarcastically. "So is she dead?"

The two vampires didn't reply.

"Can I have a taste; I mean … she's dead right so that's not against the rules! And all that blood can't go to waste…" harmony slowly started to drift into a day dream. When spike shouted 'no' it brought her back to earth. "Fine you have her I don't care" she said.

"For fucks sake harmony!" spike shouted "get a doctor!"

"fine, slayer loving freaks!"Harmony walked out of the office and over to her desk.

Buffy was soon moved to Wolfram and Harts medical wing and was fully awake. Se lay alone in a room while angel and spike spoke, or argued, with doctors outside. The blinds were closed to give her privacy but that didn't mean she couldn't hear them.

Buffy had realized that she wouldn't be moved to a proper hospital. The doctors had told angel there wouldn't be time as there had been a massive traffic accident.

Buffy rested her head on the many pillows that angel had made sure she had plenty of. Every so often she had a stab of pain from her stomach. "Looks like we are finally going to meet" she said.

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Three hours later

A beautiful baby girl lied next to Buffy in a wicker basket, which was exactly the same as hers when she was born. Her mum had shown her pictures just before she died just incase that she wasn't around for when Buffy had children. At that point, Buffy had no plans what so ever to have kids. That was when she was the sole guardian to the hell mouth.

Buffy was alone in the room. Angel and spike had come to spread the good news. Buffy's long hair was tangled and she looked incredibly tired, but she smiled at her beautiful baby girl who slept next to her.

Buffy hadn't thought of a name yet. She had a bought a baby book of names a couple of days ago but that had proven useless. But currently her mind and body were to tired to do anything and she soon drifted off to sleep.

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new chapter coming soon , I hope you like it ! Please review.

Thanks for taking time to read my first ever fanfic ! I know its amazing aint it lol nah only kidding. Well I like it and I hope you do too! 


	29. Chapter 29

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Spike junior

Buffy was still lying in bed and looking through her baby book looking for a name. There was a knock at the door and she looked up. "Come in" she said. She wasn't expecting anyone; no one had come to see her or the baby yet.

Spike opened the door and stepped in. "hi pet" he said as he closed the door behind him.

Buffy gave a weak smile, "hi" she said.

"How you feeling?" he asked her.

"Tired" Buffy said as she adjusted her hair that was in a loose pony tail. She looked like she had some type of animal on her head.

Spike nodded and sat down at the end of the bed. He looked into the wicker basket that was next to the bed. She gave a little smile.

"This then?" he said.

"Well I don't see any other babies around here" she said.

He chuckled, "yeah I guess not." There was a slight pause. "She's beautiful, just like her mum".

Buffy smiled, "well not at the moment" she said as she played with her hair some more.

"You look gorgeous love" he told her.

Spike looked back at the sleeping baby. "Can I hold her?" he asked her.

Buffy nodded and reached over to the basket. She took the small baby out of the basket and carefully passed her to spike.

Spike was very still as he looked at his baby. Spike gently rocked her.

Buffy smiled, this is a sight she never thought she would see. She felt like she could sit like this forever.

But the baby started to cry.

"I didn't do anything" spike said defensively.

Buffy smiled, "its ok" she said and she reached for the small girl.

"Shhhhh" she said as she rocked her. "Shhh it's ok"

Spike smiled. "So have you thought of a name?"

"A few but I haven't decided yet, its kind of a big decision." Buffy said.

"Yeah, well pick something cool" spike said.

Buffy raised her eye brows. "What like spike junior?" she asked with a smile.

"No" spike said. "Just something different. Don't choose something like Holly or Kate, everyone is called that".

Buffy nodded. "Well what ever the name I have to choose one soon, I can't keep calling her baby" Buffy only just noticed that the baby in her arms had stopped crying.

"I think I better leave you too get some rest" spike said, he stood up.

She put the sleeping baby back in the basket. She looked back up at spike. "Ok" she said.

He nodded and walked out of the room.

Buffy was left with her own thoughts again, now not just with name deciding, but whether spike would make a good dad.

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_more coming soon , promise. Please review as always. _

_Oh yeah holly and kate are some of my mates , soz maria I think your name is kinda different so I didn't add you. But yeah holly kate soz , couldn't resist !_


	30. Chapter 30

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

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Ella 

Buffy was getting sick of lying in the same room day after day and decided to go back to her apartment.

Buffy had finally come up with a name, it didn't really have a meaning behind it liked she had hoped, but she always liked the name. Her little baby girl that was lying awake in the middle of Buffy's king size bed and she was called Ella. She hadn't told spike the name yet, she hadn't had time. Ella had been keeping her up all night and when Ella slept so did Buffy; she needed all the sleep she could get! The baby had woken up three times in the middle of the night and Buffy looked so over worked. Buffy's hair was yet again a mess and she didn't really care. She knew she wouldn't have time to take care of her appearance like she used to, not that she wasn't going to try. When ever she got chance she would brush her hair and re apply her makeup and other girly things that were normal for women who didn't have kids.

Buffy watched the baby roll around on the bed. Ella was smiling which gave Buffy butterflies in her stomach. She loved her daughter so much. 'This is how mum must of felt'.

Buffy had been thinking a lot recently about what she was going to do. She couldn't bring up Ella in this apartment, inside a law firm, that was possibly evil. And then she remembered Giles proposal of going over to England. Of course she had explained to willow and Giles what had happened with her and spike but she hadn't had chance to tell them that she had already had the baby. That time would come soon though, her best friend would be ecstatic to know she was kind of an auntie as well as dawn.

Buffy sat down on the bed and played with Ella as she gurgled and rolled around more and Buffy picked up the phone from her bedside table.

She dialled in the number for the watchers council head quarters in England, she wasn't sure on the time difference or anything, and she hoped it wasn't really early in the morning.

Buffy glanced at the clock on the table and it was 9.30 so it should be around 5:30 in England, if her calculations were correct, which knowing her were wrong. Buffy had never been very academic.

"Hello" a British voice answered.

"Hi is Mr Giles there" Buffy said.

"Emm yes, who is calling" they asked.

"Its Buffy, Buffy Summers" Buffy replied.

"Oh yes, one moment"

Buffy could hear the phone being placed on a table and some one calling in the distance. Buffy heard the sound of foot steps.

"Buffy" Giles said.

Buffy smiled to hear her old mentor's voice, "hi" she said.

"Haven't heard from you in a while. How's the pregnancy going?" Giles asked calmly, this was a lot different from their last conversation when Giles at first was confused then angry at her. He never liked spike, even though he saved the world. But when Buffy had explained everything and how she wasn't back together with him, he seemed a little better. Giles had been intrigued into how she became pregnant and he had sent Wesley some of the information on the different prophecies but still Giles found nothing, which was strange, because Giles always knew the answers!

"Emm the pregnancy went great" Buffy said.

"Went?" Giles asked.

"Yeah the pregnancy went quicker than I expected" Buffy said.

"Oh I see, down to spike being a vampire probably" Giles said.

"Yeah I guess so" Buffy said. "Anyway yeah I had a baby girl called Ella; she is so sweet I can't wait for you to see her".

"Yes, willow and dawn will be excited as well. I'm guessing you haven't told them otherwise I would have heard about it" Giles said.

"There's something I wanted to talk about Giles. Remember what you said about me coming over to England and helping with the watchers council, I think I , I mean we ,might come over." Buffy said.

"Well buffy that would be great. You assistance is greatly needed, but I don't want you to feel pressurised, only come if you want." Giles said.

"Well I want to, it would be good to see everyone else" Buffy said.

"Well yes, when you decide on a date when you want to come, let me know" Giles said.

"Yeah sure" Buffy said, she was excited now, "speak to you soon, bye Giles. And give my love to everyone."

"Will do" Giles said then hung up the phone.

Buffy hung up the phone and looked at Ella who was yet again asleep. She must have tired herself out. She picked up the sleeping baby girl and put her back in her cot.

Buffy had a lot on her mind. She was already thinking about how great it would be to live in England, apart from all the tea, she wasn't a big fan.

But then Buffy had a horrible feeling wash over her. Spike wouldn't be too happy about taking his daughter back to the home country.

Well spikes opinion didn't matter. Ella was hers and she wasn't with spike anymore. It wasn't like he has legal rights or anything, technically he was dead.

But this didn't mean Buffy didn't want to hurt spike. He had been quite sweet recently and she didn't want to have another fight with him, but she couldn't stay here and keep sponging off angel and everyone else. Of course she would miss them, but she wanted a better life for her daughter and she couldn't have in demon central here.

'Maybe I don't have to tell him' Buffy thought, 'maybe I can just go'

Buffy closed the bedroom door and went into the living room. She sat down on the sofa and closed her eyes.

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More coming soon I promise , thanks to all reviews !


	31. Chapter 31

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

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The final night

Buffy had been gradually packing her things from when she told Giles she would be leaving L.A to go to England.

She had to do the packing gradually so that spike wouldn't notice; she would just leave without him knowing. She knew she wanted to tell him how much she loved him but she couldn't, she had to do what was right for her daughter.

When Buffy thought more about this she started thinking that spike couldn't do any harm, he would make a good dad, well for a vampire anyway. But Buffy knew it would be best for her to stay away from him.

He brought her away from herself, made her feel free. This was why for all this time she had been trying to convince spike and herself that she didn't love him, even though deep down she did. But she couldn't be free anymore. She had some one else to take care of, Ella was the most important thing in the world to her now; she had to be more important than spike.

Buffy put some of her clothes in a box that was hidden in her wardrobe so when Spike came over he wouldn't see. It's weird how he hadn't noticed things gradually disappearing. But this was good for her; soon they would be out of his life.

Ella was playing in her big cot thing spike had bought her yesterday. It had all different toys attached to the bars, it was a sweet gift.

Buffy was planning to leave tomorrow; she had bought tickets and called Giles. Everything was going to plan, apart from her feelings towards spike which she was trying to crush. Her feelings no longer mattered and she knew it.

Spike would be coming over later in the day, Buffy had planned this as the last time he would see his daughter, obviously he didn't know this, and he would think it was just another day.

All her clothes and other belongings were in boxes in the wardrobe and hidden in other places. She had left a few things around the room to make it still look like she was living there like normal.

Buffy sat down on the bed with a few pieces of paper and a pen. She was planning to write letters to people who deserved an explanation for her leaving without saying good bye.

First to Fred, this girl had been one of her only girl friends around this place. It meant she had someone to talk to and Buffy was sure she would see Fred again.

She took about an hour trying to find the words to say, but eventually she found them. She folded the finished letter up and put it in an envelope and slid it into the bed side table draw.

Soon after she wrote her letters to Wesley and angel and was leaving spike for last. Buffy spent at least two hours thinking then starting to write the letter when there was a knick on the door.

He was here.

Buffy put the letter in the draw and then walked out the bedroom and answered the door.

"Hey" she said as he walked in.

"Alright pet" he said coolly. "How are you?"

"I'm good thanks" Buffy said as she closed the door.

"Where's princess then?" he asked eagerly. He looked around the living room, still not noticing the decrease in furniture.

"Well I'm here" Buffy said with a smile, acting as naturally as possible. "But she's in the bedroom, playing in that play pen cott thingy"

Spike walked through to Buffy's bedroom and sat at the end of the bed looking at the baby girl who was getting bigger everyday, she wasn't even a year old yet.

Buffy followed him in, she smiled.

"So how have you been?" she asked Spike, making their usual friendly conversation. This was a lot different from their conversations before Ella was born, and Buffy preferred it this way.

"I've been ok. Annoying peaches as much as ever, and its still hilarious" he said as he picked Ella up out of the play pen. Ella gurgled a little.

"Good, well not good that your pissing off angel coz you know what he's like he might try and find a way to turn you back into a ghost, but I'm glad you're ok." Buffy rambled.

Spike laughed. "Well that would be funny as well, because then he would never get rid of me" he said as he bounced Ella on his knee gently.

"Yeah" Buffy said. She was starting to feel bad about what she was going to do.

Spike looked away from Ella for a moment to look at Buffy, ""you sure you're ok pet?" he asked. Obviously he could tell when something was wrong, he had known her for long enough.

Buffy hid it, "yeah I'm fine, just a little tired. Your princess keeps me awake at night."

Buffy had an idea. It was a good one as well, and he deserved it.

"Spike why don't you take Ella for the night? You have an apartment don't you. I will come and get her in the morning." she said.

"Really luv?" he asked.

"Sure, it will give me some peace for a while" Buffy said with a smile.

Spike nodded, "that would be great" he said. Then he looked at Ella. "Would you like that?" he asked his daughter.

"I'll find some things for you to take for the night" Buffy said.

Spike nodded and stood up and walked into the living room carrying Ella.

Buffy went into the wardrobe and pulled out one of the travel bags she had for Ella. She placed it on the bed. At least Buffy could have some peace on her final night and Spike could have one last night with his daughter.

Buffy went into the living room carrying everything Spike would need.

"Thanks so much for this luv, it means a lot" Spike said.

"Yeah I know" Buffy said with a smile. She handed him the bag, he had his hands full. She went to open the door for him and he walked out.

"I'll be over in the morning" she said.

Buffy closed the door with a sigh; she turned to look around and continued to pack the rest. She had booked some removal people for 10pm; they would transport everything to England. At this time Buffy new there would be no one in the parking lot and they would be taking everything down the back stairs, which led to the parking lot, so no one would see.

Buffy pulled the boxes out of the cupboards and wardrobes and starting piling them up.

The rest of the evening she finished the letter to spike. That was one of the hardest letters she ever had to write.

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_More coming soon! _

_this chapter took me ages to write so I hope you like it. _

_I know some of you were expecting abit more of a spuffy story, that was my original idea but it my ideas have changed a lot through the fic and I hope you guys aren't disappointed. I really hope you like it still and appreciate reviews. You guys keep me writing!_


	32. Chapter 32

_I don't own any of the characters in this they all belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue_

_This is my first fanfic so I know its not going to be as good as everyone else's. But I'll have a go anyway. Wish me luck and please review. Tell me how I can make it better in future and which bits you like about it. I've noticed a few spelling/grammatical errors, I blame my stupid spell check I can't use it. I will try and make sure that everything is right _

_Historians note: This happens a few years after Buffy season 7. There was no end of angel and there was no apocalypse. _

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Final goodbye

Buffy was ready to go. Everything was shipped off to England, she had left the letters in her apartment, except for Spike's she was going to leave it in his apartment some where so he would be the first one to find out she was gone.

She knocked on his apartment door to find no answer. The door was open so she quietly walked in. it was surprisingly tidy, apart from Ella's things stacked on the table. She glanced into the bedroom and saw Spike asleep on the bed; she smiled and quietly packed Ella's things in the travel bag.

She put the bag over her shoulder and placed the envelope on the table.

She walked into the bedroom and picked Ella up out of his arms, she was so careful not to wake him. Buffy slipped out of the room after.

Minutes later after Buffy had closed the door spike opened his eyes and noticed Ella was gone. He jumped off the bed and ran into the living room and noticed the letter on the table. He opened it and noticed Buffy's handwriting.

_Spike, _

_I know you're not going to like this, but I've taken Giles up on his offer of going to England. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you in person. I don't think I could stand the look on your face, probably the look you have as you're reading this. _

_I wanted to tell you I love you. I guess I always have even when I didn't and wouldn't admit it to myself. And even when I did tell you down in the hell mouth you didn't believe me, but anyway, I say it again. I do love you. _

_I'm sorry for taking Ella away from you. Its just I want her to have a normal life and what kind of a life can she have here. With all the demons and apocalypses we all come across, it's no life for a baby. _

_I've gone to England because that's were I'm needed. My friends need me, not just the other slayers. I want Ella to grow up knowing she has people around her who love her. _

_I know you will probably try to find us, but I can't stand any more heart ache, I think its best for me to cut myself off from you completely. I have Ella to think about now; I can no longer be selfish. She needs me. _

_So I hope the last night with your daughter was a good one. I will tell her that her father was a good man and he loved her, I haven't really thought of what else to say her yet. But there is plenty of time for that. _

_So this is my last goodbye, please don't hate me. I'm trying to do what's right. _

_You will always be in my heart. _

_All my love, Buffy _

Spike didn't have any words to say at that moment. He couldn't believe what was happening. All he knew was that he had to stop them from leaving.

Buffy was already in the lobby, she acted as normal as she walked towards the exit where a cab was waiting to take her to the airport.

Spike ran down two flights of stairs to the lobby. "Buffy!" he shouted as he saw her going towards the exit.

Buffy couldn't believe it; she wanted to leave quietly now this was never going to happen.

Buffy stopped and turned around, Spike walked up to her. Ella was still asleep in her arms.

"You can't just leave" he said.

"Well I can, and I am" Buffy said harshly. She didn't have time for this she was going to miss her flight. And she didn't want to stay here and argue with him all day, in the end he would probably persuade her to stay.

"What about her, she needs a dad" spike said.

"Well, I did ok without one." Buffy said.

"I have rights, you can't just take her back to the home country" spike said.

"You? Rights?" she laughed. "Spike you're a vampire, you don't have rights, and if this went to court I would win. So just let me go".

Spike grabbed her arm, "you said you loved me, in the letter, you said it" she said.

"Yes I know" Buffy said as she looked into his eyes. "But that doesn't change anything. I still have to go, Giles and everyone is expecting me. She deserves a good life"

Spike let go of her. "And you think I can't give her a good life".

"Spike you're a vampire" she repeated. "You can't exactly take her to the park on a warm summer day, or take her to school in the morning. You can't be like a normal dad".

This hurt spike, "so you think you can be a proper mum. You're not normal either Buffy, you're a slayer! It's not like you have a nine to five job." He said.

Buffy shrugged, "I have people I can count on. I'm sorry I've got to go"

"Buffy, I love you" he said.

"I love you to, but I still have to go" Buffy turned around.

"Will this make you happy?" spike asked.

"Probably not" Buffy said facing the door, "but it's what I have to do".

With that, Buffy walked out into the bright morning sunshine, leaving spike alone inside the building. He couldn't do anything. He couldn't go outside.

Buffy walked down the steps, tears in her eyes. The cab driver put her bag in the trunk of the car and she got in. She wiped the tears away from her eyes and looked at her daughter.

"Where to?" the cab driver asked.

"The airport please" she said.

She watched the building die out as she drove further and further away, finally she turned and looked to the road ahead of her.

Everything was going to be different.

The end

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Ok that's the end finally. I hope you guys liked it.

My ideas changed so much throughout the fic, so many ideas so little time. But I hope you all like what I finally came up with. I know a few of you may be disappointed with the ending, none spuffy I know. But this was the easiest way, I feel, that if I wanted to do a sequel this would be the best way to be able to write one. If that makes any sense.

I want to thank every single reviewer. You guys gave me the urge to write more, not to give up like with everything else I do.

This was my very first fanfic and the response has been over whelming, my writing has improved throughout and im very happy with it.

I want to thank Maria and Holly specially, two of my best friends , thanks for helping me sort out all my ideas and im sorry for talking your ears off in English class. I know it's annoying. Thanks for reading it even though you don't have a clue about Buffy.

Emm yeah so I guess that's all, everyone who read it thanks a lot. Every one who didn't they missed out a lot. And I hope you read my other stories.

If I get enough response there may be a sequel, I have a few cool ideas. Hopefully it won't be as long as this one hehehe. Maybe a little more Spuffy as well, Spike and Buffy are meant to be together ! we all know it !

Thanks again. See ya, Hope xxxxx


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